Did Brian really say that?

[Luna]

That is SO Brian.

[♩♬🐸 Billy C ♯♫♩🐇]

Yeah, no doubt. I really think there's money to be made in a book full of Brian's quotes, kind of like the "In Their Own Words" Beach Boys book. I can picture it now "The Wit and Wisdom of Brian Douglas Wilson". To top it off, there should be a section where Brian is asked about a variety of different topics (war, drugs, sex, religion, food) and he has to say the first that that comes to mind. Which is pretty much what he does anyway, but still...

There's money to be made in that, people!

[Jay]

I like food. 

[Luna]

Yeah, no doubt. I really think there's money to be made in a book full of Brian's quotes, kind of like the "In Their Own Words" Beach Boys book. I can picture it now "The Wit and Wisdom of Brian Douglas Wilson". To top it off, there should be a section where Brian is asked about a variety of different topics (war, drugs, sex, religion, food) and he has to say the first that that comes to mind. Which is pretty much what he does anyway, but still...

There's money to be made in that, people!

Hahaha, that would be an interesting read, I'm sure. The funniest (and probably the most endearing) thing is that he doesn't even realise how it sounds to other people. He's just answering questions honestly, and probably doesn't put any thought into whether it's appropriate or not. Very childlike.

I remember the quote that someone else shared in another thread, about how he doesn't listen to the Beach Boys' music, because that would be like masturbating to your own stuff (or something to that extend). SO Brian.

[♩♬🐸 Billy C ♯♫♩🐇]

Q: Brian, what is your opinion on the war in Iraq?
A: The world needs more love. Love and Mercy, I call it. Cake is good. Very good. Real spiritual, cake is.

I remember the quote that someone else shared in another thread, about how he doesn't listen to the Beach Boys' music, because that would be like masturbating to your own stuff (or something to that extend)

Yep, and he made the hand jesture, too.

BTW, welcome to the board!

[Luna]

Q: Brian, what is your opinion on the war in Iraq?
A: The world needs more love. Love and Mercy, I call it. Cake is good. Very good. Real spiritual, cake is.

I remember the quote that someone else shared in another thread, about how he doesn't listen to the Beach Boys' music, because that would be like masturbating to your own stuff (or something to that extend)

Yep, and he made the hand jesture, too.

BTW, welcome to the board!

Aww, Brian and his cake. Wouldn't it be funny if Brian got his people to ship a ton of birthday cake to Iraq to preach love and mercy? Something like that wouldn't even shock me anymore, honestly.

Ha, the hand gesture was just the cherry on top. I laughed so hard when I read that, because I could just picture Brian doing that, and then carrying on like nothing happened. I wonder if the interviewer could keep a straight face.

And thank you so much

[Jay]

Listen very carefully at around 5:03 into this clip:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=FuaY96UsmK8

[♩♬🐸 Billy C ♯♫♩🐇]

I like how that was not spoken over by the narrator. If you didn't know the context...

Brian's barber f***ed up, as you can tell his hair is uneven in the back. I hate it when that happens.

[Jay]

Now, that was way back in 1988. For Brian to say that once is funny. For him to do it again is just plain disturbing. 

[XY]

I have a strange feeling that he may somehow, deep down inside, regret  wanting a divorce from Marilyn.

I doubt Brian wanted a divorce. The final straw from Marilyn's site was when Brian tried to give young Carnie a drug. Now think about that for 2 seconds. You can only imagine what else was going on in the Wilson household around that time. And that was after the first Landy therapy. I guess Marilyn just didn't have the nerves to go through the whole hell once again, they had two children to raise. Landy was the only doctor who had any success with Brian, they tried different psychiatrists before.

[endofposts]

I read the interview where Brian said he regretted his first marriage.  I'm not sure where it was from, but I have no problem believing Brian said it and may have meant it at the time.  As is often pointed out, he can change his mind from day to day.  But they were both awfully young when they married.  Brian had such severe problems.  Maybe he meant in that statement that he regretted putting Marilyn through so much, not just that he was sorry he married her because he wasn't happy with her.  I don't think David Leaf has a very favorable opinion of Marilyn.  She does not come off very well in "Beach Boys and the California Myth."  So, I think Brian has more than just Melinda in his life that is not a fan of Marilyn.  I don't doubt Landy wasn't crazy about her, either.   I think Brian did benefit by having Marilyn in his life.  He might have wound up in a worse place without her.  I also feel the same about Melinda, regardless of what some people write about her.  No matter what she's done that supposedly the public is not privy to, that marriage has worked for Brian.   He could have done worse.

[adamghost]

I read the interview where Brian said he regretted his first marriage.  I'm not sure where it was from, but I have no problem believing Brian said it and may have meant it at the time.  As is often pointed out, he can change his mind from day to day.  But they were both awfully young when they married.  Brian had such severe problems.  Maybe he meant in that statement that he regretted putting Marilyn through so much, not just that he was sorry he married her because he wasn't happy with her.  I don't think David Leaf has a very favorable opinion of Marilyn.  She does not come off very well in "Beach Boys and the California Myth."  So, I think Brian has more than just Melinda in his life that is not a fan of Marilyn.  I don't doubt Landy wasn't crazy about her, either.   I think Brian did benefit by having Marilyn in his life.  He might have wound up in a worse place without her.  I also feel the same about Melinda, regardless of what some people write about her.  No matter what she's done that supposedly the public is not privy to, that marriage has worked for Brian.   He could have done worse.

I've met both Melinda and Marilyn.  I have nothing against Melinda.  Marilyn, who I've spent more time around, is awesome.  I just wanted to say that.

[Mike]

The one problem I have with many on this board is this hatred of Melinda Wilson, and this attempt to canonize Marylin.  I have nothing against Marilyn Wilson, but their marriage ended many years ago, and both have gone on with their lives.  I think it's also good that they still have a relationship, and isn't strange that Melinda hasn't put a stop to that, when if you believe all that is said about her she would.  I'm not trying to be an apologist for Melinda, I don't know her, I can only go from what I see, and that is a healthier, both emotionally and physically, Brian.  He has tried and I think in most cases tamed his demons, he tours now, he finished Smile, and he is about to release something that could be very special.  Not everything has been great there has been some gaffs, but if you look at Brian's life since he has been with Melinda, and stop listening to unsubstantiated rumors, you see someone who is in a better place than he ever has been.  I just find it hard to assign people I don't know with labels, Marylin is good, Melinda is evil.  Life is to complicated for that, and the truth usually lies in between.

[Sheriff John Stone]

It seems like Brian and Marilyn had something very special, and it's really a shame that they had so few good years together.

They did have SO FEW good years together didn't they?

In my above post, I expressed some surprise that Brian and Marilyn divorced. On the other hand, I guess it shouldn't have been a surprise. How many HAPPY years did they have together? I believe it was in late 1964 or early 1965 when Brian first experimented with LSD, and Marilyn said that he was never the same person again. We know about Marilyn's displeasure with Brian's behavior and the "hangers on" in 1966-67. It was shortly after they had their children when Brian started living "like a vampire", sleeping in late and going out at night, hanging out with people like Danny Hutton. And, of course, there was the low point of 1974-75. I don't know the facts, so I won't get into the Debbie Kiel and Rocky Pamplin stuff.

So really, how many happy years of marriage did they have?

[JimC1702]

On the "...just wasn't made for these times" DVD, Marilyn was very supportive of Brian even though he was with Melinda at the time.  She also spoke pretty harshly about the other members of the band and their contribution to his downfall. 

I'm sure she had some resentment for basicly being left alone to raise two small girls on her own while Brian "checked out", but she obviously cared for and respected him.

As far as the name thing goes, it may be cynical, but she probably kept it for whatever boost it could give her real estate career.  Who could blame her?

[Amy B.]

The one problem I have with many on this board is this hatred of Melinda Wilson, and this attempt to canonize Marylin.. .  I just find it hard to assign people I don't know with labels, Marylin is good, Melinda is evil.  Life is to complicated for that, and the truth usually lies in between.

I agree with you. I think there's often a tendency to make the former wife into a saint and the second wife into a demon. Hello, Cynthia and Yoko? And, not saying Heather Mills is a great person (I think she's an extreme example), but I'm sure Linda wasn't perfect. This may happen because the first wife is married to the guy during the time he's at his peak, and therefore it seems she's better for him. I don't know. Marilyn has said that Brian should just be allowed to do what he wants. Well, suppose they were still married, and Brian was sitting at home, 300 pounds, doing nothing. Would that be better? I think both the wives have done things to help and harm Brian, and he them. They're all human. All of the women I just mentioned have/had an enormously difficult job, just being married to a rock star.

[Wirestone]

In general, I think men (oftentimes the main superfans of BW/BB music) find strong women disturbing and off-putting. Melinda is obviously a tough cookie. Marilyn seems like a far softer personality. Guess what? People like her better. But that has nothing to do with which one is/was better (whatever that even means) for Brian.

[Luna]

Here's the thing that I still don't get, and I've brought this up before. Did Marilyn ever really acknowledge the role mental illness played in Brian's life, or did she always mostly attribute his decline to drugs?  The reason I wonder is because of answers like this, from a Kingsley Abbot interview:

Q: In retrospect, do you think Brian could have coped, or been helped to cope with the pressures that came from success?

A: I think Brian would have been able to cope, if it were not for drugs. Anyone who knew Brian, pre-drugs, saw an eccentric, talented, beautiful, sensitive person, who made them laugh, and feel good. He was a beautiful human being.

I think we have to look at where she’s coming from (in case she does blame it entirely on drugs). She was fourteen years old when she met Brian. She was sixteen years old when they got married. She was sixteen or seventeen when he first tried marijuana and LSD, and she felt he was never the same after that. He was also a musician and a genius one at that, and a lot of very talented musicians are very eccentric and very different. So while it’s obvious to us now that Brian was mentally ill back then, it all started with the drugs for her, continued with the drugs and ended with the drugs. Brian was on drugs during (almost) the whole duration of their marriage, and was on drugs when they split up. I don’t think she’s trying to be ignorant about it, I think she just honestly feels that that was when the radical personality-change started. I can also understand why Marilyn feels that Brian should be allowed to do whatever he wants to do, because she has seen him be pushed to the max, and how that affected him. So while it might not be the best thing for him to sit at home all day, I can understand why she feels the way she does.

It seems like Brian and Marilyn had something very special, and it's really a shame that they had so few good years together.

They did have SO FEW good years together didn't they?

In my above post, I expressed some surprise that Brian and Marilyn divorced. On the other hand, I guess it shouldn't have been a surprise. How many HAPPY years did they have together? I believe it was in late 1964 or early 1965 when Brian first experimented with LSD, and Marilyn said that he was never the same person again. We know about Marilyn's displeasure with Brian's behavior and the "hangers on" in 1966-67. It was shortly after they had their children when Brian started living "like a vampire", sleeping in late and going out at night, hanging out with people like Danny Hutton. And, of course, there was the low point of 1974-75. I don't know the facts, so I won't get into the Debbie Kiel and Rocky Pamplin stuff.

So really, how many happy years of marriage did they have?

Well, at least from what has been documented, it does seem like they had a lot of stuff against them from the very beginning. To be honest, I often wonder what would’ve happened in terms of Brian and Marilyn’s marriage, if Brian had continued the Landy therapy in the late 1970s. Of course it’s impossible to say and it’s pure speculation, but if we pretend that Landy had… well, not been a nutcase, and Brian had gotten off the drugs, then I wonder if they could’ve made the marriage work. Because it seems like the drugs were the biggest problem for Marilyn – not Brian’s mental illness (which of course was connected, but I think, had she known, that they could’ve made it work). Again, it’s just speculation. Because they did stay together for a long time (considering how Brian, according to Marilyn, changed completely in 1965 after his first marijuana experience), and so I would think there was something there.

The one problem I have with many on this board is this hatred of Melinda Wilson, and this attempt to canonize Marylin.. .  I just find it hard to assign people I don't know with labels, Marylin is good, Melinda is evil.  Life is to complicated for that, and the truth usually lies in between.

I agree with you. I think there's often a tendency to make the former wife into a saint and the second wife into a demon. Hello, Cynthia and Yoko? And, not saying Heather Mills is a great person (I think she's an extreme example), but I'm sure Linda wasn't perfect. This may happen because the first wife is married to the guy during the time he's at his peak, and therefore it seems she's better for him. I don't know. Marilyn has said that Brian should just be allowed to do what he wants. Well, suppose they were still married, and Brian was sitting at home, 300 pounds, doing nothing. Would that be better? I think both the wives have done things to help and harm Brian, and he them. They're all human. All of the women I just mentioned have/had an enormously difficult job, just being married to a rock star.

I can only speak for myself personally, but for me, it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that she is Brian’s second wife. I have a problem with the fact that in every interview Brian does (where she is included), she mentions how she gives him the emotional security he never had. It just seems like she’s very self-promoting, much like Landy was. Now, I’m not comparing the two, but it seems like they are/were both very eager to take credit for whatever progress Brian has made, and that just doesn’t seem very humble to me, nor does it seem very likable. I can only speak for myself, but I just have a problem with the way she says things, and I wish she would stay more in the background. I’m just sick of hearing about how much she gives him, and how much their kids give him, and how he never had that before, and while Brian might say “My wife” when asked what keeps him going, or what made him finish SMiLE, I would rather hear it FROM HIM, than from her.

[Luna]

Listen very carefully at around 5:03 into this clip:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=FuaY96UsmK8

Hahaha, oh god, I love how completely random that ends up sounding because he says that just as the German narrator stops talking (and you can actually hear what he's saying). That's priceless. On a different note, my heart hurts so much when I see interviews with Brian from that time-period. The Diane Sawyer interview is especially heartbreaking to me.

[Bicyclerider]

Certainly one reason Marilyn kept the Wilson name is she is the mother of two daughters named Wilson - it's not uncommon for divorced women to keep their married name so it is the same as the children's.  Less confusion in school, etc.

I don't know Marilyn but I have met Melinda and was very imrpessed with how warm, cordial, and nice she was.  I'm sure she is a little self-serving with promoting what she has done for Brian - but it seems to be true, so why shouldn't she get the credit?  It can't be easy living with Brian and dealing with his demons on a daily basis.  She's done an amazing job of keeping him on an even keel, getting him treatment, and protecting his legacy - and getting him out in public and on stage (who would ever have thought that would happen?) promoting his music, finishing Smile and now TLOS.  It's pretty remarkable when you consider the state he was in before.

[Amy B.]

I think we have to look at where she’s coming from (in case she does blame it entirely on drugs). ... I don’t think she’s trying to be ignorant about it, I think she just honestly feels that that was when the radical personality-change started. I can also understand why Marilyn feels that Brian should be allowed to do whatever he wants to do, because she has seen him be pushed to the max, and how that affected him. So while it might not be the best thing for him to sit at home all day, I can understand why she feels the way she does.
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[I can only speak for myself personally, but for me, it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that she is Brian’s second wife. I have a problem with the fact that in every interview Brian does (where she is included), she mentions how she gives him the emotional security he never had. It just seems like she’s very self-promoting, much like Landy was. Now, I’m not comparing the two, but it seems like they are/were both very eager to take credit for whatever progress Brian has made, and that just doesn’t seem very humble to me, nor does it seem very likable. I can only speak for myself, but I just have a problem with the way she says things, and I wish she would stay more in the background. I’m just sick of hearing about how much she gives him, and how much their kids give him, and how he never had that before, and while Brian might say “My wife” when asked what keeps him going, or what made him finish SMiLE, I would rather hear it FROM HIM, than from her.

I do understand about Marilyn and where she's coming from, but on the other hand, he has since been diagnosed with mental illness, and even though he seemed to have changed after taking drugs, what he was really trying to do was to medicate his psychological problems. Indications are that even if he hadn't taken drugs, his mental issues would have escalated, and his behavior still would have changed. Someone would have had to address those problems eventually. Still, we don't know how much the drugs exacerbated the mental illness and vice-versa.

In terms of Melinda, I don't see that she's self-serving at all. She doesn't do very many interviews, and when she does, there seems to be good reason. Brian isn't exactly the best spokesperson for his situation all the time. Sometimes I'm sure journalists are grateful to get to talk to her so she can explain what's going on. In her answers to questions, her focus is on Brian. When she says things like, "Brian has emotional security now," that's a very reasonable answer to the question, "What do you think has caused Brian to become more productive?" I don't know that she's necessarily comparing herself to Marilyn, but maybe she's referring to the larger situation-- a supportive family armed with knowledge and backed by UCLA doctors, a supportive band, supportive friends who presumably aren't taking drugs and can be there for Brian when he needs them... versus the complications of the Beach Boys, the lack of knowledge about what was going on with Brian and how to help him, and friends (some of them) who were on drugs and not exactly reliable for support. Brian's whole environment now may be more conducive to his emotional health, and based on his behavior much of the time, it is.

I agree with the poster who said that strong women catch a lot of flack.

[Luna]

Certainly one reason Marilyn kept the Wilson name is she is the mother of two daughters named Wilson - it's not uncommon for divorced women to keep their married name so it is the same as the children's.  Less confusion in school, etc.

I don't know Marilyn but I have met Melinda and was very imrpessed with how warm, cordial, and nice she was.  I'm sure she is a little self-serving with promoting what she has done for Brian - but it seems to be true, so why shouldn't she get the credit?  It can't be easy living with Brian and dealing with his demons on a daily basis.  She's done an amazing job of keeping him on an even keel, getting him treatment, and protecting his legacy - and getting him out in public and on stage (who would ever have thought that would happen?) promoting his music, finishing Smile and now TLOS.  It's pretty remarkable when you consider the state he was in before.

I guess what I just wonder is why anyone has to take credit for where Brian is today? Brian is definitely in a better state today, yes, and I think that's wonderful and I am happy for him, but I just feel that Melinda should let that speak for itself, and that that would be more tactful. But that's just me.

I think we have to look at where she’s coming from (in case she does blame it entirely on drugs). ... I don’t think she’s trying to be ignorant about it, I think she just honestly feels that that was when the radical personality-change started. I can also understand why Marilyn feels that Brian should be allowed to do whatever he wants to do, because she has seen him be pushed to the max, and how that affected him. So while it might not be the best thing for him to sit at home all day, I can understand why she feels the way she does.
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[I can only speak for myself personally, but for me, it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that she is Brian’s second wife. I have a problem with the fact that in every interview Brian does (where she is included), she mentions how she gives him the emotional security he never had. It just seems like she’s very self-promoting, much like Landy was. Now, I’m not comparing the two, but it seems like they are/were both very eager to take credit for whatever progress Brian has made, and that just doesn’t seem very humble to me, nor does it seem very likable. I can only speak for myself, but I just have a problem with the way she says things, and I wish she would stay more in the background. I’m just sick of hearing about how much she gives him, and how much their kids give him, and how he never had that before, and while Brian might say “My wife” when asked what keeps him going, or what made him finish SMiLE, I would rather hear it FROM HIM, than from her.

I do understand about Marilyn and where she's coming from, but on the other hand, he has since been diagnosed with mental illness, and even though he seemed to have changed after taking drugs, what he was really trying to do was to medicate his psychological problems. Indications are that even if he hadn't taken drugs, his mental issues would have escalated, and his behavior still would have changed. Someone would have had to address those problems eventually. Still, we don't know how much the drugs exacerbated the mental illness and vice-versa.

In terms of Melinda, I don't see that she's self-serving at all. She doesn't do very many interviews, and when she does, there seems to be good reason. Brian isn't exactly the best spokesperson for his situation all the time. Sometimes I'm sure journalists are grateful to get to talk to her so she can explain what's going on. In her answers to questions, her focus is on Brian. When she says things like, "Brian has emotional security now," that's a very reasonable answer to the question, "What do you think has caused Brian to become more productive?" I don't know that she's necessarily comparing herself to Marilyn, but maybe she's referring to the larger situation-- a supportive family armed with knowledge and backed by UCLA doctors, a supportive band, supportive friends who presumably aren't taking drugs and can be there for Brian when he needs them... versus the complications of the Beach Boys, the lack of knowledge about what was going on with Brian and how to help him, and friends (some of them) who were on drugs and not exactly reliable for support. Brian's whole environment now may be more conducive to his emotional health, and based on his behavior much of the time, it is.

I agree with the poster who said that strong women catch a lot of flack.

I completely understand what you're saying, and I completely agree that what happened wasn't due to the drugs. I guess what I was just trying to say was that I could understand why she would feel that way, as her world changed when he started using drugs, and while evidence shows that he would've gone down that path anyway, her reality was that it became obvious after the drugs. That's what I meant

As for Melinda, I guess I just feel that... I don't know, that by saying that he has emotional security now, you (not you, of course) imply that he didn't before, and I don't think that's completely true. Brian was completely out of control before, and I don't think Melinda would've helped back then necessarily. If Brian had been properly diagnosed back then, had been given the right medication, had been off-drugs, etc, then I think Marilyn and the girls would've been as much of a stable environment as Melinda and the kids. Of course we will never know, but that's just the way I see it. While I'm sure it's hard for Melinda to be married to Brian (it is without a doubt), she has the advantage of having a sober, properly-medicated husband. She also, like you said, has a team of doctors, and a good support-system. Marilyn didn't. So I do feel like Melinda has the advantage. Melinda was also a 48 year old woman when she married Brian, and they had been dating for years. Marilyn was 16 years old, a kid, who felt secure in marrying the person Brian was in 1964, and was married to a completely different Brian by 1965. I'm sure that Marilyn gave and could've given him emotional security (I'm not saying that you say she couldn't).

But I completely understand what you're saying, and I respect your opinion. I just feel differently about Melinda, I suppose AND I just want to add that I only have the utmost respect and admiration for strong women, so that has nothing to do with my feelings about Melinda at all - I just don't like her.

[Bean Bag]

Like  everyone else in the family, she  blames it all on  the drugs. That's obviously another difference of opinion between Marilyn and Melinda.

That's one thing I really like about Marilyn.  She knew Brian before and after "the drugs."  She knew the score.

I take it that Melinda's stance--on the other hand--is the baby-boomer favorite "our parents made us this way."   

We all get dealt different hands.  Marilyn's strength in this regard allowed Brian to do things his way-and pay the price-his way.  That's all you CAN do.  And Brian ultimately had to have known, at the very least that he was still driving his own car.  Had Melinda been his wife in the 70s, I wonder what would have happened.

 

[Bicyclerider]

 Had Melinda been his wife in the 70s, I wonder what would have happened.

 
[/quote]

He would be driving the car Melinda sold him.

[Aegir]

Another thing, though, is that Melinda met Brian when he was under Landy's care (if I'm not mistaken), so her first impression was, "Okay, this is a guy who needs someone to watch over him and control him." When Marilyn met Brian, he was an intelligent adult and she was just a teen. Marilyn expected Brian to take care of her, not the other way around.