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650712 Posts in 26004 Topics by 3711 Members - Latest Member: JPP4 September 21, 2019, 10:31:56 AM
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Author Topic: Deep question concerning 'You Still Believe In Me'  (Read 880 times)
Magic Transistor Radio
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« on: June 13, 2019, 10:15:46 AM »

Perhaps a bit 'Dear Abbey' and may belong in the Sandbox....

I just listened to the new episode on the  Sail On podbean.
https://sailon.podbean.com/
These have been great if you haven't heard them yet! This latest episode is about 'You Still Believe In Me'. Something they mentioned is how personal and open Brian (or Tony Asher) is. Brian described it as exposing the female side. They mentioned how a lady gets weirded out by a guy that does this. My question has more to do with my lack of understanding of women. So any women on here, I would appreciate your input as well. First, I know that on a first date, or even early in a relationship,  being this open would be weird. But is it still weird when the couple is deep in a relationship? If so, what is the difference between being sensitive and opening up like this? Perhaps they want a 'manly' man, but if we are all being honest here, men have a feminine side. As much as we wish to be 'macho', we also deep down want to be able to express these kinds of deep feelings to someone that will listen and understand. As someone who has been single most of my life, I have had a difficult time connecting with a woman as I am  kind of a unique soul that wasn't made for these times. Sorry, perhaps this belongs in the sandbox. Lol!
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 10:32:27 AM by Magic Transistor Radio » Logged

"Over the years, I've been accused of not supporting our new music from this era (67-73) and just wanting to play our hits. That's complete b.s......I was also, as the front man, the one promoting these songs onstage and have the scars to show for it."
Mike Love autobiography (pg 242-243)
Cabinessenceking
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« Reply #1 on: June 13, 2019, 02:57:51 PM »

There are so many toxic concepts about what it means to be a "man". Men are sadly often derided and put down for not being "man enough". The gender role of the man is oppressive towards men as it prevents men from being allowed to show emotions and for being themselves. This kind of toxic masculinity is also extremely oppressive towards women, but that's a separate discussion. I think Brian's music and Asher's lyrics (and that Brian was comfortable singing these lyrics at a time like 1966)  show great musical and emotional maturity from both of them.
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 03:06:20 PM by Cabinessenceking » Logged
RangeRoverA1
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« Reply #2 on: June 13, 2019, 04:40:31 PM »

Stay single, adopt cat =  3D & cute/fun.
Brian's vulnerability is sth. I find charming.
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Short notice: the cat you see to the left is the best. Not counting your indoor cat who might have habit sitting at your left side when you post at SmileySmile.

Gene Tierney is beautiful. She's talented.

"Broiler Brunch" - check in theaters new fam TV series! Better than since Bradys!
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« Reply #3 on: June 13, 2019, 05:44:12 PM »

There are so many toxic concepts about what it means to be a "man". Men are sadly often derided and put down for not being "man enough". The gender role of the man is oppressive towards men as it prevents men from being allowed to show emotions and for being themselves. This kind of toxic masculinity is also extremely oppressive towards women, but that's a separate discussion. I think Brian's music and Asher's lyrics (and that Brian was comfortable singing these lyrics at a time like 1966)  show great musical and emotional maturity from both of them.

Reminds me of a line from "Wouldn't It Be Nice (To Live Again)".  Too bad it wasn't released for 40-something years!

 - Tell me, whoever said a man can't cry? I know I can cry.
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Magic Transistor Radio
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« Reply #4 on: June 13, 2019, 06:04:43 PM »

Stay single, adopt cat =  3D & cute/fun.
Brian's vulnerability is sth. I find charming.

I don't like cats.  Geek
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"Over the years, I've been accused of not supporting our new music from this era (67-73) and just wanting to play our hits. That's complete b.s......I was also, as the front man, the one promoting these songs onstage and have the scars to show for it."
Mike Love autobiography (pg 242-243)
RangeRoverA1
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« Reply #5 on: June 13, 2019, 06:26:08 PM »

I simply meant that you must embrace being single, not try to find woman to connect with. If you get lonely - adopt pet. I like cats, thus obviously brought cats as pet example. It's really fun & joyful when 4-pedal creature meets you at the door or when you walk together, play ball, frisbee etc. You can even talk with them, discuss things.
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Short notice: the cat you see to the left is the best. Not counting your indoor cat who might have habit sitting at your left side when you post at SmileySmile.

Gene Tierney is beautiful. She's talented.

"Broiler Brunch" - check in theaters new fam TV series! Better than since Bradys!
MyDrKnowsItKeepsMeCalm
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« Reply #6 on: June 13, 2019, 07:48:08 PM »

I think Brian's music and Asher's lyrics (and that Brian was comfortable singing these lyrics at a time like 1966)  show great musical and emotional maturity from both of them.

Very much agree. The first line alone is bold, and haunting. I can imagine it sounded quite a bit shocking circa 1966.

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MyDrKnowsItKeepsMeCalm
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« Reply #7 on: June 13, 2019, 07:59:30 PM »

First, I know that on a first date, or even early in a relationship,  being this open would be weird. But is it still weird when the couple is deep in a relationship? If so, what is the difference between being sensitive and opening up like this? Perhaps they want a 'manly' man, but if we are all being honest here, men have a feminine side. As much as we wish to be 'macho', we also deep down want to be able to express these kinds of deep feelings to someone that will listen and understand.

This might be way out of left field, but your line of questioning reminds me somewhat of the "Mars and Venus" book series. I was definitely more of an introverted Brian Wilson type than an extroverted Mike Love type (LOL) when in my 20s, and books like those were actually helpful to me in understanding the differences between men's and women's perceptions, and expected gender roles in early dating and early relationships. I liked the "Mars and Venus on a Date" book in particular for that reason. Again, kind of out of left field but FWIW you may find them interesting and/or helpful.

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Magic Transistor Radio
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Bill Cooper Mystery Babylon


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« Reply #8 on: June 14, 2019, 06:30:49 AM »

First, I know that on a first date, or even early in a relationship,  being this open would be weird. But is it still weird when the couple is deep in a relationship? If so, what is the difference between being sensitive and opening up like this? Perhaps they want a 'manly' man, but if we are all being honest here, men have a feminine side. As much as we wish to be 'macho', we also deep down want to be able to express these kinds of deep feelings to someone that will listen and understand.

This might be way out of left field, but your line of questioning reminds me somewhat of the "Mars and Venus" book series. I was definitely more of an introverted Brian Wilson type than an extroverted Mike Love type (LOL) when in my 20s, and books like those were actually helpful to me in understanding the differences between men's and women's perceptions, and expected gender roles in early dating and early relationships. I liked the "Mars and Venus on a Date" book in particular for that reason. Again, kind of out of left field but FWIW you may find them interesting and/or helpful.



I will check it out
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"Over the years, I've been accused of not supporting our new music from this era (67-73) and just wanting to play our hits. That's complete b.s......I was also, as the front man, the one promoting these songs onstage and have the scars to show for it."
Mike Love autobiography (pg 242-243)
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