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Douchepool
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« Reply #125 on: June 05, 2016, 12:05:24 PM »

And may I ask what said precise qualities are?
As I said above, even if a quarrel is not actually about Mike Love, there seems to be a fault line where one side of the quarrel will be people who frequently take a stance of defending ML and the other is people who frequently take a stance of criticizing him.
I think the bulk of the 'defending' people have moved there and the bulk of the 'critcizing' people have stayed here. Other people, of which there are many, have sorted themselves according to their comfort level with the individuals of those groups.
There are some people who could legitimately go back and forth without making waves in either place.

I will admit to being a defender of Mike in SOME cases but not to where it leads to putting down Brian or the rest of the band. Like that silly article going around about "destroying the Brian is a genius myth" or whatever it was, for example. Yeah, the band could do well enough when Brian had limited participation and probably should have relied more on what they could do as opposed to forcing Brian to participate during the Brian's Back thing, which might very well have led to Brian having more trouble during the late 70s until he was rehabilitated. I do not think that equals bashing Brian or unfairly propping up Mike or the rest of the band. Brian's reputation is such that he would always be a shadow cast over the band when he wasn't around as much on the records. In the past I did say some bad things in the heat of the moment that left a bad taste in many folks' mouths. I cannot take them back. I wish it was different. I also don't think blaming Craig for the negative feelings left over from that helps. He had nothing to do with that.

I was not invited there due to my views on the band. I was invited by a personal friend, no more or less. It is another place to post.
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« Reply #126 on: June 05, 2016, 12:31:55 PM »

Iain Lee's posts are exactly the sort that would be banned at the other forum. That they aren't banned here is exactly the reason why this board will continue to have 'drama' while the other will remain a peaceful club.
While I'm not necessarily supporting banning him or adopting the position of the other board on banning, because I like to think that people won't make trouble just for the sake of it, I'm afraid many people do.
It's unfortunate that there are people who, when they have a peaceful option, won't take it.

The kudos I will give him is for admitting part of the type of PM personal attack bullshit that has been ripping this board apart for longer than anyone would like to admit.

Maybe it will inspire others who got such PM's or even those that attempted to "correct" someone's opinions that may have been considered unwelcome opinions to step forward.
I've edited my post above, because Mr. Lee was not aware of the other forum nor of everything that's been happening.
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« Reply #127 on: June 05, 2016, 12:44:37 PM »

And may I ask what said precise qualities are?
As I said above, even if a quarrel is not actually about Mike Love, there seems to be a fault line where one side of the quarrel will be people who frequently take a stance of defending ML and the other is people who frequently take a stance of criticizing him.
I think the bulk of the 'defending' people have moved there and the bulk of the 'critcizing' people have stayed here. Other people, of which there are many, have sorted themselves according to their comfort level with the individuals of those groups.
There are some people who could legitimately go back and forth without making waves in either place.

I will admit to being a defender of Mike in SOME cases but not to where it leads to putting down Brian or the rest of the band. Like that silly article going around about "destroying the Brian is a genius myth" or whatever it was, for example. Yeah, the band could do well enough when Brian had limited participation and probably should have relied more on what they could do as opposed to forcing Brian to participate during the Brian's Back thing, which might very well have led to Brian having more trouble during the late 70s until he was rehabilitated. I do not think that equals bashing Brian or unfairly propping up Mike or the rest of the band. Brian's reputation is such that he would always be a shadow cast over the band when he wasn't around as much on the records. In the past I did say some bad things in the heat of the moment that left a bad taste in many folks' mouths. I cannot take them back. I wish it was different. I also don't think blaming Craig for the negative feelings left over from that helps. He had nothing to do with that.

I was not invited there due to my views on the band. I was invited by a personal friend, no more or less. It is another place to post.
I was invited myself and I really appreciate the invitation.
I was not implying that you've said unreasonable things, as long as I've been here, nor that you've put down Brian, as far as I've seen. I'm just saying that there's an obvious divide. And maybe 10% of posters fall very clearly on one side or the other; maybe 60 percent are more vaguely on one or the other; and the rest not.
The people who are clearly on one side, and the people who are more vaguely on that side, are more likely to feel welcomed there than the people clearly or vaguely on the other side. That may be how it will be long-term, it may not.
Most of the people who provided all the off-topic fun (not talking about politics) that gave me the most pleasure I've had here, are now over there. I would very much like to continue interacting with them. But there are a few people that I have tremendous difficulty getting along with, so to avoid causing trouble, I've not gone over there.
I would just like it if everyone could prioritize, for a bit, not causing trouble. It's like, when you have two kids, you don't mind them disagreeing and discussing it, or even arguing to a point, but when it goes too far, they each need to go to their separate rooms for a while. And it doesn't really matter who started it; who's right; who's wrong. A break is simply necessary.
So now there are two rooms. Temporarily, let's have some PEACE.
« Last Edit: June 05, 2016, 01:03:14 PM by Emily » Logged
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« Reply #128 on: June 05, 2016, 12:47:32 PM »

And may I ask what said precise qualities are?
As I said above, even if a quarrel is not actually about Mike Love, there seems to be a fault line where one side of the quarrel will be people who frequently take a stance of defending ML and the other is people who frequently take a stance of criticizing him.
I think the bulk of the 'defending' people have moved there and the bulk of the 'critcizing' people have stayed here. Other people, of which there are many, have sorted themselves according to their comfort level with the individuals of those groups.
There are some people who could legitimately go back and forth without making waves in either place.

I will admit to being a defender of Mike in SOME cases but not to where it leads to putting down Brian or the rest of the band. Like that silly article going around about "destroying the Brian is a genius myth" or whatever it was, for example. Yeah, the band could do well enough when Brian had limited participation and probably should have relied more on what they could do as opposed to forcing Brian to participate during the Brian's Back thing, which might very well have led to Brian having more trouble during the late 70s until he was rehabilitated. I do not think that equals bashing Brian or unfairly propping up Mike or the rest of the band. Brian's reputation is such that he would always be a shadow cast over the band when he wasn't around as much on the records. In the past I did say some bad things in the heat of the moment that left a bad taste in many folks' mouths. I cannot take them back. I wish it was different. I also don't think blaming Craig for the negative feelings left over from that helps. He had nothing to do with that.

I was not invited there due to my views on the band. I was invited by a personal friend, no more or less. It is another place to post.
I was invited myself and I really appreciate the invitation.
I was not implying that you've said unreasonable things, as long as I've been here, note that you've put down Brian, as far as I've seen. I'm just saying that there's an obvious divide. And maybe 10% of posters fall very clearly on one side or the other; maybe 60 percent are more vaguely on one or the other; and the rest not.
The people who are clearly on one side, and the people who are more vaguely on that side, are more likely to feel welcomed there. Than the people clearly or vaguely on the other side. That may be how it will be long-term, it may not.
Most of the people who provided all the off-topic fun (not talking about politics) that gave me the most pleasure I've had here, are now over there. I would very much like to continue interacting with them. But there are a few people that I have tremendous difficulty getting along with, so to avoid causing trouble, I've not gone over there.
I would just like it if everyone could prioritize, for a bit, not causing trouble. It's like, when you have two kids, you don't mind them disagreeing and discussing it, or even arguing to a point, but when it goes to far, they each need to go to their separate rooms for a while. And it doesn't really matter who started it; who's right; who's wrong. A break is simply necessary.
So now there are two rooms. Temporarily, let's have some PEACE.

Well said.  Smiley
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« Reply #129 on: June 05, 2016, 12:56:25 PM »

As previously said, who wouldn't be for peace and coexistence but it should also come with honesty about how things developed. Too often calls for dropping things from the discussion comes off like an attempt to sweep the core issues (or the truth behind them) even further under the proverbial carpet.
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« Reply #130 on: June 05, 2016, 01:05:04 PM »

As previously said, who wouldn't be for peace and coexistence but it should also come with honesty about how things developed. Too often calls for dropping things from the discussion comes off like an attempt to sweep the core issues (or the truth behind them) even further under the proverbial carpet.
I disagree. Problems are never solved when the people involved are in the heat of it, u less there's all out war and one side destroys the other.
Problems are solved after a time out when emotions are calmer.
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« Reply #131 on: June 05, 2016, 01:10:25 PM »

As previously said, who wouldn't be for peace and coexistence but it should also come with honesty about how things developed. Too often calls for dropping things from the discussion comes off like an attempt to sweep the core issues (or the truth behind them) even further under the proverbial carpet.
I disagree. Problems are never solved when the people involved are in the heat of it, u less there's all out war and one side destroys the other.
Problems are solved after a time out when emotions are calmer.

Problems definitely are not solved either when one side gets to do all the talking and those who have a right to challenge are shut down before they can speak their opinions. Especially and more glaringly when the only side heard has serious issues with lack of credibility and honesty and barely anyone might know what happened to lead up to it.

Give everyone a fair airing out, get it on the table, both sides. If it causes friction, then maybe those who engaged in the bad behavior should have thought twice before acting that way.
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« Reply #132 on: June 05, 2016, 01:57:03 PM »

Problems cannot be solved when some people on BOTH sides are too set in their ways to compromise.  You're not going to be able to convince 100% of people 100% of the time. Besides there are some people who know the truth and refuse to accept it. You know what? So be it.  f*** 'em. I'm not going to beat myself up trying to fix people that can't be fixed.  It's not good for my blood pressure and I have enough stress as it is
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« Reply #133 on: June 05, 2016, 02:38:11 PM »

I'm now registered on both boards. I didn't get an invite or was involved in a secret coup (I guess I don't rate). I'm having fun reviewing albums. Although I've done that on here, it's nice having another place to do it (almost an excuse to revisit albums I hadn't thought about in a while).

I don't think anyone here has to worry about members leaving in droves or the new board suddenly usurping the other. I'm beginning to think that the drama here (backstage or out in front like the Observer thread) is actually one of the main appeals of this board for a certain percentage of members. I have little use for that sort of thing. All I ask, and have continued to ask for months on end, is that members here not be allowed to clog up threads with "Mike and Bruce are pieces of s**t", etc. over and over again. I don't see any of that on PSF so it's a-ok to me so far. 
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« Reply #134 on: June 05, 2016, 02:56:34 PM »

As previously said, who wouldn't be for peace and coexistence but it should also come with honesty about how things developed. Too often calls for dropping things from the discussion comes off like an attempt to sweep the core issues (or the truth behind them) even further under the proverbial carpet.
I disagree. Problems are never solved when the people involved are in the heat of it, u less there's all out war and one side destroys the other.
Problems are solved after a time out when emotions are calmer.

Problems definitely are not solved either when one side gets to do all the talking and those who have a right to challenge are shut down before they can speak their opinions. Especially and more glaringly when the only side heard has serious issues with lack of credibility and honesty and barely anyone might know what happened to lead up to it.

Give everyone a fair airing out, get it on the table, both sides. If it causes friction, then maybe those who engaged in the bad behavior should have thought twice before acting that way.

Well, everyone's right, in that things aren't resolved in the heat of the moment.  Then again, all of these past board collapses (remember, I wasn't there, so...) indicate that issues were never on the table and resolved, so this idiocy keeps happening.   SS is a truly tough survivor in the midst of all of this, by all appearances.  We'll see where it goes from here, but I appreciate that the Underworld didn't take it down.  There's a new forum for all the old members here.  I rather like that they're there and I don't have to see what they're saying.  The word may be out to be well-behaved for awhile - even the racists, sexists and bullies who were banned here. As long as I don't have to deal with them, that's good.
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« Reply #135 on: June 05, 2016, 03:18:30 PM »

I'm back. GF, in another thread you said that I don't get that there's a right and a wrong. I do get that. I've read what you've written and I believe what you've said. I think you are right. I just don't think it helps right now to continue the fight.

Regarding the PMs, AGD's been banned. I honestly don't think that Iain Lee was up on the details of what's happened in the last few months. I think he posted something that he knew was going to be controversial in that thread today; but in normal circumstances wouldn't be out of line. It wasn't a screed. It was a pretty mild thing, though button pushing. In response, ORR posted a quite nasty post. Then Iain Lee escalated in a really big way; ORR escalated back and it was really unpleasant. I asked Iain Lee to stop. And after a time, he agreed to. I asked ORR to stop as well. Iain Lee was wrong to bring up the PMs and was wrong to escalate; but he didn't write the PMs. The writer has been banned.

I think anyone who cares one way or another has heard what you have to say. If they still don't believe it, they aren't going to. Even if more evidence was posted, they still won't believe it. They've dug in to their positions. But, for the most part, they aren't here anymore. So I think it's best to make this a pleasant place for those who are or for others who wish to join.

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« Reply #136 on: June 05, 2016, 03:40:45 PM »

I'm back. GF, in another thread you said that I don't get that there's a right and a wrong. I do get that. I've read what you've written and I believe what you've said. I think you are right. I just don't think it helps right now to continue the fight.

Regarding the PMs, AGD's been banned. I honestly don't think that Iain Lee was up on the details of what's happened in the last few months. I think he posted something that he knew was going to be controversial in that thread today; but in normal circumstances wouldn't be out of line. It wasn't a screed. It was a pretty mild thing, though button pushing. In response, ORR posted a quite nasty post. Then Iain Lee escalated in a really big way; ORR escalated back and it was really unpleasant. I asked Iain Lee to stop. And after a time, he agreed to. I asked ORR to stop as well. Iain Lee was wrong to bring up the PMs and was wrong to escalate; but he didn't write the PMs. The writer has been banned.

I think anyone who cares one way or another has heard what you have to say. If they still don't believe it, they aren't going to. Even if more evidence was posted, they still won't believe it. They've dug in to their positions. But, for the most part, they aren't here anymore. So I think it's best to make this a pleasant place for those who are or for others who wish to join.



That last sentence is what I wish I could get through to everybody. 
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« Reply #137 on: June 05, 2016, 04:12:57 PM »

I'm back. GF, in another thread you said that I don't get that there's a right and a wrong. I do get that. I've read what you've written and I believe what you've said. I think you are right. I just don't think it helps right now to continue the fight.

Regarding the PMs, AGD's been banned. I honestly don't think that Iain Lee was up on the details of what's happened in the last few months. I think he posted something that he knew was going to be controversial in that thread today; but in normal circumstances wouldn't be out of line. It wasn't a screed. It was a pretty mild thing, though button pushing. In response, ORR posted a quite nasty post. Then Iain Lee escalated in a really big way; ORR escalated back and it was really unpleasant. I asked Iain Lee to stop. And after a time, he agreed to. I asked ORR to stop as well. Iain Lee was wrong to bring up the PMs and was wrong to escalate; but he didn't write the PMs. The writer has been banned.

I think anyone who cares one way or another has heard what you have to say. If they still don't believe it, they aren't going to. Even if more evidence was posted, they still won't believe it. They've dug in to their positions. But, for the most part, they aren't here anymore. So I think it's best to make this a pleasant place for those who are or for others who wish to join.



If the discussion had been shut down after Iain's mention of the PM's, it would have lingered as would the hard feelings. If he didn't know what else was behind these issues, he found out more of the real story and posted as he did. If he were led to believe whatever Andrew Doe (if that's who it was, I don't recall Iain actually saying it was him although the previous information backed up that it was) told him, now he knows what actually happened. That is a good outcome, although maybe my priority is different than some in that I don't like seeing someone get a raw deal based on misinformation or outright lies, and if that happens they have a right to defend themselves. In the name of keeping peace, you don't just pull the plug so the lies are allowed to stand as the fact of note, and the person who is subject of the lies doesn't get a say. To me that's worse than pulling the plug and allowing both the lies to stand and the liars to get away with it.

This also showed that the after-effects of however many campaigns or efforts had been going on from Andrew's or anyone else's private messages that are still lingering and which despite efforts to clarify and make right each case that comes up, here was another case that people who received the messages were still believing them, and despite explanations in the past they must have either missed them or the lie was stronger than the explanation.

So if and when these issues appear again, they will be addressed and called out for the bullshit that they were and are, no matter where on the board they happen to show up. It's only fair to all parties to have the chance to not only defend themselves but also to get the facts known so everyone has the truth versus believing whatever lies have taken hold.

It is not only frustrating beyond belief but also very sad to think about how many of these campaigns and PM blasts and efforts to ruin or diminish other board members are still out there and are lingering to this day because people don;t know what exactly went on. There could be dozens more, there could be one more...but even one was and is too many.

It's good to know not only the game but also the players, and how things were done. Anyone can then weigh who or what they want to believe once the truth actually comes out.
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« Reply #138 on: June 05, 2016, 04:22:53 PM »

Continued from the other thread:

I don't understand.  I don't use PMs, but figured people bitching in them about other people is par for the course.

I think most figured that may happen naturally. Someone posts things others don't like or in a way people don't agree with, people will naturally start chewing the fat over it.

But what isn't par for the course and should never have been par for the course is having a board member or members launch a campaign against another board member or members - specifically based on lies or things that simply didn't happen - that includes fishing for personal and contact info like it's some private eye situation, contacting other members with information about other members' personal lives, habits, or even family info, and whatever other dirt and slime can be generated...

...in the name of silencing someone or having them kicked off this forum or any other reason for that matter. That goes beyond anyone's idea of par for the course, and if the residue from any of that garbage happens to appear in some form, it will be addressed and the truth will be told so everyone is clear on the facts.

The PM function was set up for members to reach out to each other, not to destroy other board members or launch campaigns to find whatever results are being sought.

Imagine dealing with this on a music forum...and it's supposed to be all about the music.

Still a lot of heavy lifting to be done to clear this sh*t out and move forward. If the garbage trucks need directions on where to take their loads of this trash and debris, a map can be provided.  Smiley
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« Reply #139 on: June 05, 2016, 05:19:33 PM »

And I'm still waiting for that personal invitation so many people got to join that board.   Cool Guy

You'd almost think that I'm not someone desired there.  But maybe I'm just paranoid. Uh-huh...



I did not get an invitation but notified by friends that I am being insulted over there. Like anything, they will reap what they sow
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« Reply #140 on: June 05, 2016, 05:21:30 PM »

Iain Lee's posts are exactly the sort that would be banned at the other forum. That they aren't banned here is exactly the reason why this board will continue to have 'drama' while the other will remain a peaceful club.
While I'm not necessarily supporting banning him or adopting the position of the other board on banning, because I like to think that people won't make trouble just for the sake of it, I'm afraid many people do.
It's unfortunate that there are people who, when they have a peaceful option, won't take it.

The kudos I will give him is for admitting part of the type of PM personal attack bullshit that has been ripping this board apart for longer than anyone would like to admit.

Maybe it will inspire others who got such PM's or even those that attempted to "correct" someone's opinions that may have been considered unwelcome opinions to step forward.
I've edited my post above, because Mr. Lee was not aware of the other forum nor of everything that's been happening.

I went over there. He seems to have been a member from the get go.
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« Reply #141 on: June 05, 2016, 05:29:42 PM »

And I'm still waiting for that personal invitation so many people got to join that board.   Cool Guy

You'd almost think that I'm not someone desired there.  But maybe I'm just paranoid. Uh-huh...



I did not get an invitation but notified by friends that I am being insulted over there. Like anything, they will reap what they sow

Where were you insulted over there?  I honestly haven't seen your name mentioned in anyway.
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« Reply #142 on: June 05, 2016, 05:31:27 PM »

Iain Lee's posts are exactly the sort that would be banned at the other forum. That they aren't banned here is exactly the reason why this board will continue to have 'drama' while the other will remain a peaceful club.
While I'm not necessarily supporting banning him or adopting the position of the other board on banning, because I like to think that people won't make trouble just for the sake of it, I'm afraid many people do.
It's unfortunate that there are people who, when they have a peaceful option, won't take it.

The kudos I will give him is for admitting part of the type of PM personal attack bullshit that has been ripping this board apart for longer than anyone would like to admit.

Maybe it will inspire others who got such PM's or even those that attempted to "correct" someone's opinions that may have been considered unwelcome opinions to step forward.
I've edited my post above, because Mr. Lee was not aware of the other forum nor of everything that's been happening.

I went over there. He seems to have been a member from the get go.

Unless he's going under a different name, I don't believe he's a member yet.
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« Reply #143 on: June 05, 2016, 05:34:38 PM »

Iain Lee's posts are exactly the sort that would be banned at the other forum. That they aren't banned here is exactly the reason why this board will continue to have 'drama' while the other will remain a peaceful club.
While I'm not necessarily supporting banning him or adopting the position of the other board on banning, because I like to think that people won't make trouble just for the sake of it, I'm afraid many people do.
It's unfortunate that there are people who, when they have a peaceful option, won't take it.

The kudos I will give him is for admitting part of the type of PM personal attack bullshit that has been ripping this board apart for longer than anyone would like to admit.

Maybe it will inspire others who got such PM's or even those that attempted to "correct" someone's opinions that may have been considered unwelcome opinions to step forward.
I've edited my post above, because Mr. Lee was not aware of the other forum nor of everything that's been happening.

I went over there. He seems to have been a member from the get go.

Unless he's going under a different name, I don't believe he's a member yet.

Maybe Andrew would know since he's been promoting it on other forums and sending invites.
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« Reply #144 on: June 05, 2016, 05:37:28 PM »

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« Reply #145 on: June 05, 2016, 05:40:51 PM »

Just saw an announcement on Facebook regarding a new Beach Boys forum:

http://beachboys.boards.net/

I wish them well! 

Ha Ha, thought it was worth going back to the thread intro. By the COB/Head Honcho, no less. A very nice gesture.
Kaboom!
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♩♬🐸 Billy C ♯♫♩🐇
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« Reply #146 on: June 05, 2016, 05:46:19 PM »

Iain Lee's posts are exactly the sort that would be banned at the other forum. That they aren't banned here is exactly the reason why this board will continue to have 'drama' while the other will remain a peaceful club.
While I'm not necessarily supporting banning him or adopting the position of the other board on banning, because I like to think that people won't make trouble just for the sake of it, I'm afraid many people do.
It's unfortunate that there are people who, when they have a peaceful option, won't take it.

The kudos I will give him is for admitting part of the type of PM personal attack bullshit that has been ripping this board apart for longer than anyone would like to admit.

Maybe it will inspire others who got such PM's or even those that attempted to "correct" someone's opinions that may have been considered unwelcome opinions to step forward.
I've edited my post above, because Mr. Lee was not aware of the other forum nor of everything that's been happening.

I went over there. He seems to have been a member from the get go.

Unless he's going under a different name, I don't believe he's a member yet.

Maybe Andrew would know since he's been promoting it on other forums and sending invites.

Maybe you know since you know the whole truth?

Ah c'mon man, no need for that
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« Reply #147 on: June 05, 2016, 05:55:14 PM »

Maybe you know since you know the whole truth?

Someday, Kid, it will make sense to you.

One thing about the internet is it saves money on the cost of invitations, both the invitations themselves and the postage. Mailing them from the UK is quite expensive unless it's being underwritten and declared as a business expense.
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« Reply #148 on: June 05, 2016, 05:58:13 PM »

And I'm still waiting for that personal invitation so many people got to join that board.   Cool Guy

You'd almost think that I'm not someone desired there.  But maybe I'm just paranoid. Uh-huh...



I did not get an invitation but notified by friends that I am being insulted over there. Like anything, they will reap what they sow

Where were you insulted over there?  I honestly haven't seen your name mentioned in anyway.
I didn't see it, just told. I tried to find it but kinda hard to navigate around. It's all good though. :-)
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« Reply #149 on: June 05, 2016, 06:01:40 PM »

And I'm still waiting for that personal invitation so many people got to join that board.   Cool Guy

You'd almost think that I'm not someone desired there.  But maybe I'm just paranoid. Uh-huh...



I did not get an invitation but notified by friends that I am being insulted over there. Like anything, they will reap what they sow

Where were you insulted over there?  I honestly haven't seen your name mentioned in anyway.
I didn't see it, just told. I tried to find it but kinda hard to navigate around. It's all good though. :-)

Would it be surprising to learn you did not get an invitation? Did you?
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"All of us have the privilege of making music that helps and heals - to make music that makes people happier, stronger, and kinder. Don't forget: Music is God's voice." - Brian Wilson
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