Cam Mott
Smiley Smile Associate
 Offline
Posts: 4171
|
 |
« Reply #50 on: June 14, 2015, 04:05:46 AM » |
|
Thats why God made the Courtesy Bus
(giggle) |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
"Bring me the head of Carmen Sandiego" Lynne "The Chief" Thigpen
|
|
|
rasmus skotte
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 369
|
|
« Reply #51 on: June 14, 2015, 04:54:46 AM » |
|
Time to bring in this homebrewed palindromic limerick (by cd/rs/jk - in succession):
Sex if dat Dennis/JESSE nixes...
on NO ton-o-SMiLE mono mixes!
'a.k.A. sex I'm on O'
M(e)L: "I'm so NOT on no...
- sexiness!" E.J. sinned, Tad fixes
['Jesse' from Jesse & the Rippers=Dennis wannabe and Mike/M(e)L sycophant: Stamos. "Sex I'm on.." = us SMiLE/Brian-sycophants. E.J.=Elton John (originally a Brian-wannabe).Tad=Tad Jennings (an Elton-wannabe)]
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
Comics/cartooniés
(Fun Fun FUNniés)/Graphic NOVELties
Manga/animé
Bande dessinée
Tegneserié
|
|
|
petsoundsnola
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 374
|
|
« Reply #52 on: June 14, 2015, 05:09:36 AM » |
|
Wheeeeeeeeeennnnn
some washed-up actor tries to drag through town and thinks his hair's still great,
I tell him right away,
Now whats a matter Jesse ain't you heard of the cops
They'll lock you up in this State...
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
SMiLE Brian
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 8433
|
|
« Reply #53 on: June 14, 2015, 06:31:37 AM » |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
And production aside, I’d so much rather hear a 14 year old David Marks shred some guitar on Chug-a-lug than hear a 51 year old Mike Love sing about bangin some chick in a swimming pool.-rab2591
|
|
|
bossaroo
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 1631
...let's be friends...
|
|
« Reply #54 on: June 14, 2015, 07:50:46 PM » |
|
this thread rules.
I had to prove a medical condition now,
but that's not me.
I wanted to show I wasn't drunk as a skunk now,
but that's not me.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Ron
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 5086
|
|
« Reply #55 on: June 14, 2015, 07:57:03 PM » |
|
I can seeeee, you're drunk by your eyessss
But sirrrr.... can you walk a straight line....
There are things we both could SAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
But don't tallllk, put your hands on the hoood sirrr
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
SMiLE Brian
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 8433
|
|
« Reply #56 on: June 14, 2015, 08:01:30 PM » |
|
Ron  |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
And production aside, I’d so much rather hear a 14 year old David Marks shred some guitar on Chug-a-lug than hear a 51 year old Mike Love sing about bangin some chick in a swimming pool.-rab2591
|
|
|
Douchepool
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 883
Time to make the chimifuckingchangas.
|
|
« Reply #57 on: June 14, 2015, 08:06:41 PM » |
|
It starts with just a little sip now
Right away you're thinkin' 'bout more sips now
You know you oughta pound 'em slower
But you just can't wait to hit the flo-oooooor
A brand new bottle of booze is such a beautiful thing
But if you're not careful think of all the pain it can bring
It makes you puke so bad
It makes your face turn red
It makes your girl go down
It makes your dick so long
You've got to keep in mind beer is here today
And it's gone tomorrow
It's here and gone so fast
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
The Artist Formerly Known as Deadpool. You may refer to me as such, or as Mr. Pool.
This is also Mr. Pool's Naughty List. Don't end up on here. It will be updated.
|
|
|
SMiLE Brian
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 8433
|
|
« Reply #58 on: June 14, 2015, 08:11:08 PM » |
|
You made me believe in love again!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
And production aside, I’d so much rather hear a 14 year old David Marks shred some guitar on Chug-a-lug than hear a 51 year old Mike Love sing about bangin some chick in a swimming pool.-rab2591
|
|
|
Cyncie
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 714
|
|
« Reply #59 on: June 14, 2015, 08:12:39 PM » |
|
Wheeeeeeeeeennnnn
some washed-up actor tries to drag through town and thinks his hair's still great,
I tell him right away,
Now whats a matter Jesse ain't you heard of the cops
They'll lock you up in this State...
Hey, hey! Take him away! Put that drunk in jail! |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Ron
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 5086
|
|
« Reply #60 on: June 14, 2015, 08:19:55 PM » |
|
Run, a Run, a Beer Run Run
Oh Oh! Run, A Run, A Beer Run Run
Whoa Whoa! Run! A Run, A Beer Run Run
Whoa Ohhhhhhh!
Well my legs aren't steady but I'm a Soap Opera Beautyyyy
And all the girls still call me a Full House Cuuuuttieeee
I've been drinkin' half the night but the beer's run dry
And the quik-e-mart's open even at this time of night
Run, a Run, a Beer Run Run
Oh Oh! Run, A Run, A Beer Run Run
Whoa Whoa! Run! A Run, A Beer Run Run
Whoa Ohhhhhhh!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Pretty Funky
Smiley Smile Associate
 Online
Posts: 5861
|
|
« Reply #61 on: June 14, 2015, 08:42:35 PM » |
|
I'm thinkin I'm Dennis Wilson
I'm drinkin like Dennis Wilson
I sang Forever like Dennis Wilson (oom bop bop good inebriations)
I like the ladies like Dennis Wilson (oom bop bop inebriations)
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
The Cincinnati Kid
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 802
|
|
« Reply #62 on: June 14, 2015, 08:49:34 PM » |
|
Tuning in the latest star
From the jail cell in my town
Cruising at seven
DUI at 11
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
halblaineisgood
Guest
|
|
« Reply #63 on: June 15, 2015, 12:27:08 AM » |
|
that whole fake medical emergency thing, does that ever work?? Won't they eventually figure out you're drunk at the hospital? I guess he forgot maybe, that there's tons of cops at a hospital ...
I bet he wanted to make a sneaky escape. Get the vitals checked. Then: Casually remove his bracelet , IV and gown--- stroll past the nurse's station, charming them to death, with his handsomene virility--and immediately break into a dead sprint for the nearest taxi = crisis avoided.
Too bad. So sad.
Clever idea, though.
|
|
|
|
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 12:54:00 AM by halblaineisgood »
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Cliff1000uk
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 410
|
|
« Reply #64 on: June 15, 2015, 01:38:21 AM » |
|
It's been such a long day so I better hurry home
Forgot my licence and I wish I was home
Only five minutes and I'll fall through the door
Beer in the morning
Beer in the evening
Beer and make my glass fuuuuuuulllll
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
petsoundsnola
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 374
|
|
« Reply #65 on: June 15, 2015, 05:49:19 AM » |
|
I keep looking for a bar to drink in where I can lose my mind
I've been trying hard to find Uncle Joey who I won't leave behind
I got really nice hair but it ain't doing me no good
I wish it could
Each time I start drinkin’ again
I think I’ll pour something good for myself
But what goes
(Wrong?)
Sometimes I drum very bad
Sometimes I drum very bad
(Can't find a big glass I can pour my Margarita into)
Sometimes I drum very bad
(Can't find a big glass I can pour my Margarita into)
I guess I just love me some Early Times
Every time I take a swig of Moonshine and go drive all around
Aunt Becky wants to help me look for places where sobriety might be found
Where will I turn when the Rippers won’t work out, what's it all about?
Each time I start drinkin’ again
I think I’ll pour something good for myself
But what goes
(Wrong?)
Sometimes I drum very bad
Sometimes I drum very bad
(Can't find a big glass I can pour my Margarita into)
Sometimes I drum very bad
(Can't find a big glass I can pour my Margarita into)
I guess I just love me some Early Times
I guess I just love me some Early Times
I guess I just love me some Early Times
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
petsoundsnola
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 374
|
|
« Reply #66 on: June 15, 2015, 06:23:44 AM » |
|
It starts with just a little sip now
Right away you're thinkin' 'bout more sips now
You know you oughta pound 'em slower
But you just can't wait to hit the flo-oooooor
A brand new bottle of booze is such a beautiful thing
But if you're not careful think of all the pain it can bring
It makes you puke so bad
It makes your face turn red
It makes your girl go down
It makes your dick so long
You've got to keep in mind beer is here today
And it's gone tomorrow
It's here and gone so fast
This is freakin' golden. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Douchepool
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 883
Time to make the chimifuckingchangas.
|
|
« Reply #67 on: June 15, 2015, 07:29:52 AM » |
|
It starts with just a little sip now
Right away you're thinkin' 'bout more sips now
You know you oughta pound 'em slower
But you just can't wait to hit the flo-oooooor
A brand new bottle of booze is such a beautiful thing
But if you're not careful think of all the pain it can bring
It makes you puke so bad
It makes your face turn red
It makes your girl go down
It makes your dick so long
You've got to keep in mind beer is here today
And it's gone tomorrow
It's here and gone so fast
This is freakin' golden. That's the censored version, bruh. The one I almost posted was much more politically incorrect. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
The Artist Formerly Known as Deadpool. You may refer to me as such, or as Mr. Pool.
This is also Mr. Pool's Naughty List. Don't end up on here. It will be updated.
|
|
|
The LEGENDARY OSD
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 1948
luHv Estrangement Syndrome. It's a great thing!
|
|
« Reply #68 on: June 15, 2015, 07:33:01 AM » |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
myKe luHv, the most hated, embarrassing clown the world of music has ever witnessed.
|
|
|
Mike's Beard
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 4265
Check your privilege. Love & Mercy guys!
|
|
« Reply #69 on: June 15, 2015, 09:24:12 AM » |
|
In the cantina
Margarita's keep his spirit high
There I watched him
He spun around and
Round and then he puked all over the floor.
Too much Margarita don't you know Mike Love is pissed with you
Damn
Damn
You're under arrest!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
I'd rather be forced to sleep with Caitlyn Jenner then ever have to listen to NPP again.
|
|
|
Komera
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 188
|
|
« Reply #70 on: June 15, 2015, 10:30:55 AM » |
|
In the cantina
Margarita's keep his spirit high
There I watched him
He spun around and
Round and then he puked all over the floor.
Too much Margarita don't you know Mike Love is pissed with you
Damn
Damn
You're under arrest!
Wow, another minimally altered one. I guess it just goes to show how well some of these songs lend themselves to the joke. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
~~ The MeAjur Komera Waddi ~~
|
|
|
CenturyDeprived
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 5749
|
|
« Reply #71 on: June 15, 2015, 12:19:38 PM » |
|
Alcoholic Content 4%ever
Everyone's in Love with DYouI
Don't F*ck with the Malt Liquor Formula
AA Day in the Life of a Tree
Okie from Alcoholics Anonymuskogee
Is Jack Daniels Rieley Superman?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ron
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 5086
|
|
« Reply #73 on: June 15, 2015, 04:48:36 PM » |
|
that whole fake medical emergency thing, does that ever work?? Won't they eventually figure out you're drunk at the hospital? I guess he forgot maybe, that there's tons of cops at a hospital ...
I bet he wanted to make a sneaky escape. Get the vitals checked. Then: Casually remove his bracelet , IV and gown--- stroll past the nurse's station, charming them to death, with his handsomene virility--and immediately break into a dead sprint for the nearest taxi = crisis avoided.
Too bad. So sad.
Clever idea, though.
It worked for my mom once. She was driving a car she had no title or tags for, on like a 200 mile trip (went gambling). She made it almost all the way home, then the cops pulled her over... so she faked a seizure and said she was diabetic. They took her to the hospital and left the car sitting at a gas station. True story. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Cyncie
Smiley Smile Associate
Offline
Posts: 714
|
|
« Reply #74 on: June 15, 2015, 08:02:41 PM » |
|
502, 502
Buddy gonna shut you down
It happened on the strip where the road is wide
My partner and me sitting side by side
Some actor blows by as if he's in a scene
Revvin' up his engine and it sounds real mean
502, 502
Buddy gonna shut you down
He's bound to kill somebody drivin' at this rate
So all at once we both accelerate
My squad car is hot, the tire's are startin' to spin
But I see Uncle Jessie's really diggin' in
Gotta be cool now power shift here we go
His big Italian sports car's windin' out in low
But my fuel injected squad car's really startin' to go
To get the traction I'm ridin' the clutch
My pressure plate's burnin' that machine's too much
"Pull it over, buddy, you can't drive and drink"
He claims he's sick, he needs to see his shrink
He's goin' to the hoosegow but it's understood
He's a wannabe Beach Boy, but he just ain't that good.
Shut it off, shut it off. Buddy now I shut you down
Shut it off, shut it off. Buddy now I shut you down
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Author
