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Author Topic: RNR integrity or How Beckner spent New Yrs ruining a Young Girl's Life  (Read 4544 times)
Beckner
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« on: January 01, 2006, 06:05:32 PM »

this was originally written and posted at my blog hence the style change but I think a few may enjoy it.


You Can't Always Get What You Want but Sometimes You Get a Tee Shirt

Okay so here we are folks, another year and in a week and a half, my second anniversary with Weis Markets. I never planned on lasting this long there, I swear but I said that about the last two jobs as well. More on this in another post.

I was sitting around last night lamenting a bit all the great partying I was missing out on because I was opening the office at 6am on New Year's Day. I kept thinking how I could have closed on New Year's Eve, left at 8pm and still had plenty of party time yet to go. But when I came in this morning and saw that four cashiers and mighty Jared wasn't enough to make the night go smoothly I knew I had made the right decision. The store did 65K in one day and closed 2 hours early. I think that's more than any single day since I started in the office. That's just nuts.

So I may have only had 3 hours of sleep or so but I've confronted Sunday mornings on less before so it wasn't so bad. I cranked up some music and set about the tasks at hand and it was all pretty much good.

But I digress-- there's an amusing story from New Year's Eve to tell and honestly it's one of my stories so I don't know who gets painted to be the bigger assclown here. Usually me.

I've been going to Rob's parent's for New Year's for the last seven years or so. I think Rob's sister Becky was a ten year old Girl Scout when I first started hanging out over there. Every year now it seems like the numbers, height and annoyance level of Becky's adolescent friends increases exponentially. There's a few familiar faces in among them, kids I've chatted with once a year every year. This year it was clearly their show and their party. Rob and our crew were never this hip to get this many people to such a square party, not even at their age.

Anyway, I was hanging with my boy Anthony who is 21 and has a beard. I tell you this only so you know what sort of creepazoids we must look like to these teenagers. There's one girl with a Rolling Stones tee shirt on and part of me kinda wants to just talk to her since that's pretty hip if you ask me. Then again, it also makes me look like a sleaze no matter how you slice it.

Then again, I am an asshole. Anthony and I begin developing not so subtle ways to drop the Stones into conversation, the "Miss You" gambit being the best and most hilarious idea. But nay we didn't do that either.

I watched quietly as a rather hirsute young 'un reached for the Crown Royal and poured a cup. "You aren't gonna tell are you?" "Nah." I whispered to him. "We were soldiers once... and young." feeling his underage drinking pains.

I decided to use him. "You know that girl with the Rolling Stones shirt?"

"A little. why?"

"Find out for me what her favorite Stones album is. If it's a Greatest Hits title I win."

Anthony chimed in. "I don't know what you are winning. I'm with you on this."

I go off to a corner of the yard in hysterics at the absurdity of the events.

"Dave she uh named an album."

sh*t I thought. I was wrong. "What album?"

"The Rose."

"Um um sorry." trying to not be a complete musical chode, "but that isn't a Stones album." In fact it's a Bette Midler album.

"Her mom gave her the shirt."

"Well maybe her mom would have been wise to pick up 40 Licks for her while she was at it."
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Reverend Joshua Sloane
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« Reply #1 on: January 01, 2006, 06:21:15 PM »

The Rolling Stones are soon to be the Rolling Bones.

Unless of course they are cremated.
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Did it ever occur to you, Cable, how wise and bountiful God was to put breasts on a woman? Just the right number in just the right place. Did you ever notice that, Cable?
Jason
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« Reply #2 on: January 01, 2006, 06:24:47 PM »

Steve, Steve, Steve.

LAME! Wink
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I. Spaceman
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« Reply #3 on: January 01, 2006, 07:29:01 PM »

Great stuff, my man!
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Nobody gives a sh*t about the Record Room
Reverend Joshua Sloane
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« Reply #4 on: January 01, 2006, 07:31:18 PM »

Great stuff, my man!

It was a great joke yes.

.... :D

Just kidding. Good story man, glad to know my fellow teens are in the dark with most of the real great music.
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Did it ever occur to you, Cable, how wise and bountiful God was to put breasts on a woman? Just the right number in just the right place. Did you ever notice that, Cable?
Beckner
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« Reply #5 on: January 01, 2006, 08:53:23 PM »

Thanks Ian, I figured you'd dig.
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donald
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« Reply #6 on: January 03, 2006, 07:33:48 AM »

the kids wear a lot of retro band shirts but they DO have their own music....

but it is gratifying when they show some interest in the music of my generation
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