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Author Topic: So what did we all do today?  (Read 148341 times)
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the captain
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« Reply #825 on: August 15, 2018, 07:51:27 AM »

I remember 9/11 quite well, as I expect most people who were of a certain age at the time must. I also understand what RRA1 is saying (even though I wonder if she’s alluding to me about the sympathy comments, considering we had a little discussion about homelessness rates or something not so long ago): I acknowledge that even if having universal concern is an ideal, human nature is to care most about those in our immediate families or circles, and then less as you shift outward. Throughout history most people would rank their care or sympathy in a descending order along the lines of immediate family, extended family, community, region, country, race or ethnicity, humanity. For better or worse, it is natural.
 
I had already been at work a while that morning when someone said a plane hit a one of the towers. I tried to see what was happening on the NY Times website and it had been mostly replaced with a very basic headline, summary, and image, but mostly without links or graphics, I think because the traffic was so high that it was crashing. It wasn’t clear what happened, but by the time the second plane hit, it was obviously terrorism. There were the rumors about what else happened or might happen that whole morning, maybe that whole day.
 
Reaction was quite diverse. A client of our company said we didn’t have to continue performing our contract for them that day: we could all leave. But our own company president never said any such thing: in fact, at noon that day he said something like “wow, this thing just isn’t going away, is it?” As if he thought the story should have faded into the background after three or four hours! So I finished the workday more or less as usual, though I kept an eye on the news as much as I could.
 
A good friend of mine was quite angry with me that night as we drank beer on my front porch, enjoying the suddenly quiet evening. (I lived near the airport at the time, and all air travel had been suspended.) While the specifics of the event were a surprise, the overall idea that it would have happened wasn’t: we’d had incidents with Islamist terrorists before, and had sown plenty of bad feelings in the region. But at that time, even hinting at any level of explanation was considered very unpatriotic; my friend was red-faced and practically shouting at me, “why do you hate America!?” It was weird how everyone became a rabid patriot at the flip of a switch, suddenly towing the party line.
 
Immediately everyone was saying “everything changed because of 9/11.” I thought that was a nonsense position to take. There wasn’t much surprising about the incident other than the details and the scale, maybe. It wasn’t unimaginable at all to me. And I don’t think anything much HAD to change, even though a lot DID change. To me, if one’s thinking required a major shift of perspective, that just reflected on that person’s lack of imagination or awareness prior to the incident. Suddenly our civil rights were eroded without much question just because of the tragedy.
 
An analogy might be the idea of innocence until proven guilty being reversed upon realizing that someone guilty might go free after a crime: it’s built into the concept, so why would that be a surprise?
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« Reply #826 on: August 15, 2018, 05:05:09 PM »

I meant the comments in rip threads - when smb. dies at age 90/85/80/95, people would say they're sad & I'd reply why they're sad, they lived long, good age to die. They didn't like it, brought weirdly fam examples that smb. died in the same age group & they shouldn't be sad? But this is apples & oranges - fam is fam. Celeb is celeb, even if favorite. Then, smb. weirdly defended smb. else when I said I read that people in smwr got this & that. That smb. said it's racist, as well as racist to say I dislike languages, they do not impress etc. Still puzzled in which way is it "racist". Similarly, youtube comments seem like ready to tell off anybody who doesn't grieve to the devastating vids, rather comments sth. different about the timed bits in the video. To me, it isn't kindness. If people don't write long speech about grieving, doesn't mean they may not grieve in mind. If smb. else likes to publicly show grief, do it. Let the others review the vid, tell quick observations about it etc. It annoys irl as well, when smb. starts defending smb. & when you don't, they get angry. It's unbelievable to them that even single human wouldn't defend that smb.
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« Reply #827 on: August 15, 2018, 05:37:19 PM »

I see.

I think what you’re talking about is what has been recently called “virtue signaling” in the US.

By the way, I find public grieving about celebrities very strange. Obviously I don’t wish them I’ll or anything, but as you say, when someone you’ve never met and don’t know except through movies, music, etc dies, especially if s/he is of an old age, it seems strange to me to mourn, particularly publicly. Saying RIP on a message board: the dead person and his/her family don’t read it.
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« Reply #828 on: August 15, 2018, 07:21:30 PM »

As someone who has spiritual/religious beliefs, I write "RIP" believing that perhaps the deceased's spirit would notice it. It's letting them know that I admired them in life, and wish them well in the afterlife, heaven, whatever.Might be silly but that's my 2 cents on that.

As for what I did today - not much. Did some reading and binge watched The West Wing episodes . Interesting that we're still grappling with the same problems as they faced 15 or more years ago.
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« Reply #829 on: August 16, 2018, 05:13:17 AM »

I'm going to agree with tc about celeb-grieving subject. Rare total agreement as it were. So, that's what virtue-signaling means. Seen this phrase elsewhere in the Internet, didn't know what they talk about, everytime forgot to ask here. Now looks like I got the answer without asking.

Played air hockey with Daiana. She brought cherries she bought in the way to my house. I refused. She ate alone. Cat nearly spilled her drink but by that time the cup was empty. Epic fail. Then Daiana went home (I'm as the rule against sleepovers). Her father picked her up by car (he's cab driver). Sat in veranda with cat in basket. Thankfully, it will not rain today & tomorrow. Hate it.
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« Reply #830 on: August 16, 2018, 09:08:18 AM »

Well, today was supposed to be "Elvis Day" as we're going to see the 68 Comeback Special at the theater tonight. And am still looking forward to it.
But now I am celebrating Aretha Franklin, whose wonderful music I've grooved to since childhood. Listening to an XM channel (49) doing a tribute and also to CNN.
This weekend will be devoted to binge listening to her music, hopefully starting with her earliest recordings.
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"No White Flags." - Team Gleason

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 "The best thing you can be 'like' in music is yourself." Dr. John
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« Reply #831 on: August 16, 2018, 04:15:31 PM »

Though on virtue-signaling and people who seem to be a bit to self-aggrandizing in terms of their love for all mankind:

The psychology of rescuers (those who risk their lives to save potential victims of genocide) is actually a "thing." Interestingly, they are a widely diverse group. However, they tend to have a few things in common, one of which is NOT necessarily being seen universally as kind or good or nice. They have a high level of empathy, but a genuine sort that is not for show. They tend to feel more personal responsibility for others in danger. (Rather than say how terrible the killing is, they act.) However, many more than might be expected are those whom their peers would never have suspected would take such risks for others. They are often not very popular and care little about pleasing others. They follow laws because they make sense and are ethical, not out of fear of judgement. Hence, when their society's ideas of right and wrong are turned on their head, rescuers continue to follow their own moral compass and often are able to go "under the radar." They also tend to come from parents who, through example or more directly, communicated their belief that no group of people were less than another. They often had positive relationship(s) with the hunted group as children. (For instance, in the Holocaust, they might have turned off electric lights for Jews in their neighborhood. ) My favorite story is about a French tailor whom most people just tolerated because he did good work and delivered promptly. He saved scores of Jews, hiding them in a hidden compartment in his car. With piles of suits on top of everything, he drove back and forth between
the north and south zones, each time going through a dangerous checkpoint. No one knew about this until those whom he saved stated this. He never said a word.
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« Reply #832 on: August 16, 2018, 04:38:03 PM »

Hello, Buckethead. Interesting about rescuers. It's the real kindness, esp. the bit:

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Rather than say how terrible the killing is, they act.
When various nameless commenters state about killings being terrible, they don't say anything new. It's non-comment, really. It's duh, predictable thing to say that everybody knows.

Looks like you didn't see my question, it's in previous page. I'd like you to answer it:

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You said some kids at the age as your twins/ I didn't care. Did the sons not care too?
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« Reply #833 on: August 16, 2018, 05:51:33 PM »

Yeah, I am always suspicious of people who seem to go out of their way to let others know what noble feelings they have, what kind deeds they perform. In my experience, its a cover for not being so wonderful. 

My sons seemed to take an interest in the spectacle of the planes blowing up the WTC, but did not appear to care about any other aspect of it.
I did not allow an excessive amount of coverage to be seen/heard in my home at that time. Kids can get overwhelmed when it comes to issues like this that they have no control over. We talked about it, but I wanted them to maintain a reasonable sense of safety. 
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« Reply #834 on: August 16, 2018, 06:07:44 PM »

Ab-so-lutely. Well said.

Ha! That's kids for ya.

What did you do today? Anything eventful?
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« Reply #835 on: August 16, 2018, 07:27:29 PM »

Read with my students an article about menstrual huts in Nepal. You?
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« Reply #836 on: August 16, 2018, 11:29:31 PM »

You know what - you write just like poster Emily. Don't worry, she's not troll or such. Few differences being Emily usually quotes posters she replies to, separates paragraphs without space (you at 1st written post as it would go, sentence right by sentence etc). But she would just like you say "You?", informality & friendliness paired with long discussion points, with genuine interest what the other side would say. & she travelled to many places, worked/ lived in Nicaragua. Been there, Buckethead?

To reply to question - I drink tea with biscuit. Soon we'll go walk to meet Sonya. Her dangerous-looking dog is friend to cat. I usually go to Sonya to eat many cool candies & get films for free - she's got wi-fi. She's good friend, doesn't say "install wi-fi in house, I will not share films with you".
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« Reply #837 on: August 17, 2018, 04:07:38 PM »

I don't see many posts by Emily lately; I enjoyed her thoughtfulness and spunk.   

No, I've never been to Nicaragua. I've been as far south as Guatemala when traveling as a girl with my family. A different world. The guards at the Mexican border almost didn't let us cross back over because, I think, it was 1969 and one of my brothers looked liked a stereotypical hippie. We had to empty out our whole tent trailer and car so that they could search for pot, I guess.

How nice that you have tea with biscuit. I enjoy afternoon tea, which is not a typical ritual in the USA. Does biscuitmean what Americans would call a cookie (a sweet treat)? We refer to biscuits as a non-sweetened roll, more to have with the evening meal. I once baked cookies for a homesick young lady from South Africa. She thanked me and said, "The biscuits - they were lovely!" I was a bit confused, but smiled graciously.

Very cute  - a doggy who is friendly with the kitty. In my experience, cats are always attacking indifferent dogs.

Sonya sounds like a true friend. I'm sure you bring other benefits to the relationship, such as your sense of humor!
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« Reply #838 on: August 17, 2018, 08:12:33 PM »

I didn't see Emily being spunky. At least according to definition I read in dictionary.

It's funny when people see smb. looking like hippie quickly figure it's drug taker.

What we call here biscuit (Russian "biskvit") is cake without cream toppings. The main backbone, the baked dough. Btw, SA lady may use biscuits to mean cookies. It's British equivalent to American cookie.

Cats attack dogs when they annoy them.

Thanks to compliment my sense of humor. You & few people.
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« Reply #839 on: August 18, 2018, 09:54:16 AM »

Ah, few people appreciate my sense of humor, so I know how you feel.
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« Reply #840 on: August 18, 2018, 10:22:57 AM »

Cats attack dogs when they annoy them.

The first cat we had (Minou, born 1965) was the daughter of a cat who was well known for her dog attacking skills. Dogs were terrified of her.
Her name was Hercules (named when my cousins thought she was a “he”).

Our cat Tanner is constantly going after our dog. She’ll lie down on her back, in a friendly gesture, the dog goes to her, then she attacks him! Poor dog then looks at me , expression “what did I do?”

We have 2 tea sets at home. We mean to have tea but something always comes up.
Many years ago I had a neighbor from Malawi. If he was home in the later afternoon he’d have tea and I had a standing invitation to join him. His roommate was from Kenya and he brought some really strong tasting teas from home. Drank it and swore that I could feel hair growing on my chest lol.

It’s great that your friend allows you to access her wifi. Wifi can be rather expensive.
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« Reply #841 on: August 18, 2018, 06:38:05 PM »

Today I went to my hometown because my mom was named grand marshal of the local festival, so we went to see her in the parade, etc. It's a small, rural town and the parade is not remotely exciting: fire trucks, ambulances, marching bands, a few floats and things from local businesses, veterans, and tractors. Yes, some tractors. I'm not entirely sure why...it's just what happens. It's the first of these parades I've seen since I marched in them in the early 90s as a member of the high school band. I don't get back much. But several of my aunts, a cousin, a sibling, etc., were there to support my mom as well. I think she enjoyed it. My dad, who had to ride along with her, not so much!

Got home to find the dogs had gotten through the baby gate we'd set up to keep them in the basement. Oh well, they didn't wreck anything or go too crazy.
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« Reply #842 on: August 19, 2018, 06:15:17 AM »

NOLA BB Fan - My experiences with dogs and cats have been similar to what you describe. In cartoons, of course, the dogs tend to be the aggressors!! Regarding tea, most of my American friends think of tea as having a cup, period. They don't grasp the concept in terms of the ritual, creating a space in time devoted to it.

the Captain - I wish that my cats could be somewhat controlled via a baby gate!  I love parades of any sort. I still attend hometown ones. While not exciting, they touch a sentimental place in my heart. It was fun watching my boys' faces as they experienced them, eyes wide open and going after the candy thrown by various entities.  Also, I was a flag girl in my high school band. Why was your mother made the marshall? She must have done something cool.
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« Reply #843 on: August 19, 2018, 01:50:37 PM »


the Captain - I wish that my cats could be somewhat controlled via a baby gate!  I love parades of any sort. I still attend hometown ones. While not exciting, they touch a sentimental place in my heart. It was fun watching my boys' faces as they experienced them, eyes wide open and going after the candy thrown by various entities.  Also, I was a flag girl in my high school band. Why was your mother made the marshall? She must have done something cool.

As a kid I loved the parades, mostly because of the candy. (I was terrified of clowns, though! And that was before Stephen King’s “It” made such a fear explicable.) It was sad seeing how much smaller the whole affair was, though, compared to the 80s and even 90s. Circa ‘92ish, the HS band would number about 100; yesterday’s maybe hit 25, and was grades 7-12.

My mom probably got the award for being a cofounder and prominent promoter of (and volunteer for) the local museum / historical society. They have converted a late 19th century train depot, long since empty, into a little museum. But she has also long been involved in many lives cal organizations (chamber of commerce, Kiwanis, etc) and spent a good while as editor of the local paper back when I was in HS. So it might’ve had a “lifetime achievement” flavor. (In so small a town, realistically speaking, candidates are few, too.)
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« Reply #844 on: August 19, 2018, 03:52:11 PM »

My day ... finally got the air conditioning fixed in my apartment for the first time in three weeks. Since we’re being evicted I guess they’ve got to get it ready for the next tenants.
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« Reply #845 on: August 19, 2018, 04:33:38 PM »

Billy - I'm so sorry you are going through this. I hope that you find stable, adequate housing.
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« Reply #846 on: August 20, 2018, 12:00:28 AM »

Ah, few people appreciate my sense of humor, so I know how you feel.
You & me both. :D Btw, what's "baby gate"? As I understand, it's sth. to keep pets locked. Why it's weirdly called "baby gate" then? What's baby got to do with it? Bizarre.
& what's "flag girl"? Btw, Buckethead, you can shorten NOLA BB Fan as "NBBF". Since you shorten me as RRA1. NOLA's username is long as well. Don't thank me. police
Clowns are hilarious! Funny face, funny costume, mannerisms etc. Clown in "It" is funny as hell.
Sonya's good friend, agree. But, it didn't start too good. When I met her standing in hallway in the institute, I found her a bit "posh birdie" as I dub them. Typical richie. In bizarre twist of events, she sat with me (2-people tables here, unlike in the U.S. individual single tables). When lecture began, she couldn't catch quickly what the lecturer says. Maybe got used to school teachers slowly dictating the lesson. She started looking towards my copy-book. I'd be OK with it if she didn't then start telling me to not turn the page as she didn't yet finish with the previous copy-book page. It quickly began to annoy & bring the inner choleric in me,  I told her if you didn't catch, it's your problem that you're slowpoke. She sat there writing what she caught. You'd think good, this is end. But when lecturer went, next lecture to be in 20 minutes, she said can you give me your copy-book to write the lecture down. I did as long as she finishes today before studies finish. She did, surprisingly, despite snail-like writing pace. Well, this that, chit-by-chat, I realized that she's good girl, I like her & I believe it's vice versa too. But, there's single incident where she acted funnily greedy. Not sure what was that, what's got into her. She brought "Fruitella", I said give it to me. She got capricious - no, I won't, no, no, no. Then suddenly says buy it, if you wish to taste single candy, you pay 5 roubles. Ofc I didn't. Ludicrous. But, yep, Sonya's good.
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« Reply #847 on: August 20, 2018, 12:44:19 AM »

Billy - I'm so sorry you are going through this. I hope that you find stable, adequate housing.

Yeah my disability claim got denied and the appeal can take up to 45 days. I have a possible new apartment but may not be ready in time and may have to pay a higher deposit. Meh all I can do is pray; not my first time through this.

The good news is, if I DO get approved it’s $100 less and 200 more square feet AND 15 minutes closer to work so fingers crossed
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« Reply #848 on: August 20, 2018, 01:40:26 AM »

Billy - I'm so sorry you are going through this. I hope that you find stable, adequate housing.

Yeah my disability claim got denied and the appeal can take up to 45 days. I have a possible new apartment but may not be ready in time and may have to pay a higher deposit. Meh all I can do is pray; not my first time through this.

The good news is, if I DO get approved it’s $100 less and 200 more square feet AND 15 minutes closer to work so fingers crossed

Fingers and other appendages crossed over here that you do get approved, Billy. We all love you, man.  Roll Eyes
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« Reply #849 on: August 20, 2018, 02:51:29 AM »

Billy - I'm so sorry you are going through this. I hope that you find stable, adequate housing.

Yeah my disability claim got denied and the appeal can take up to 45 days. I have a possible new apartment but may not be ready in time and may have to pay a higher deposit. Meh all I can do is pray; not my first time through this.

I'm so sorry about this. I truly believe that at least some of those people at those claims offices get on power trips and get a buzz out of denying claims. It's so common for a disability claim to be denied, but then later approved.
Wishing you well, and I'll also say a prayer that things look up for you.
And a belated Happy Birthday! :-)
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"(Brian) got into this really touching music with songs like 'In My Room', and 'Good Vibrations' was amazing. The melodies are so beautiful, almost perfect. I began to realize he was one of the most gifted writers of our generation." - Paul Simon

 "The best thing you can be 'like' in music is yourself." Dr. John
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