The (Fictional) Crimes of Jeffrey Foskett

[Mike's Beard]

1.Owning a screeching falsetto that sounds like Frankie Valli having his balls being backed over by a steamroller.
2. Being a fat turd who shouts at fans for taking photos of Brian during gigs.

.....Oh wait, you said fictional crimes.

[halblaineisgood]

.

[Paulos]

Bob may have shot the sheriff, but it was Jeff that shot the deputy.

[MarcellaHasDirtyFeet]

Dennis Wilson claimed to have been raped by Jeffrey Foskett on multiple occasions, and by a gang of Fosketts at least once.

[Iron Horse-Apples]

Getting into a debate on religion backstage at Wembley with Mike. Jeff claimed Evangelical Christianity was the only true religion and forgot to add IMHO.

Ha ha! That's funny because monotheism is by its very nature intolerent. Not like being "wimpish" and respectful of each other. What good would that do? I'm glad this board isn't like that!

[halblaineisgood]

.

[hypehat]

People, people, this is not the thread for inventing baseless slander about Mike Love. We have every other thread on the board for that. This thread is the lone outpost for exposing the real villain in this deplorable tale, one Jeffrey Foskett.

I mean, Jeff Foskett is against gay marriage. When pressed to explain his position, he clarified it by saying 'Now look, I'm not a homophobe, I just think no-one, regardless of race, creed, or sexuality, should be able to marry.'

[halblaineisgood]

.

[halblaineisgood]

.

[The Heartical Don]

Jeff Foskett is a puppet. He's not human. And Brian Wilson is a fantastic ventriloquist, albeit that the slightly falling corner of his mouth betrays what he's up to all of the time.

Not many people know this.

Bri just is very shy of the center spotlight, that's why he conceived this superb deception.

[halblaineisgood]

.

[halblaineisgood]

.

[Iron Horse-Apples]

Brian's vacant stares onstage are not to do with his illness. It's because Jeff has fed his autocue through Google Translate first into Arabic then back into English. Brian has not retreated in on himself, he is merely trying to make sense of this

Tour Tour Wrap
I wrap
Yes
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread

Bugged im gettin driving up and down the same old sector
I gotta finda new place where hip kids

My friends are getting real data known
Yes, the bad guys know us and they leave us alone

I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Tour
Wrap Tour Tour OOOO
Wah Wa OOO
Wah Wa OOO
Wah Wa OOO

We always take the reason my car has never been won
And weve missed yet never with the girls we meet

Any of the men go steady cause it would not be right
To leave their best girl home now on Saturday night

I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Tour
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

[Puggal]

Jeff's favorite Dennis Wilson song is Be Still.

 

[♩♬🐸 Billy C ♯♫♩🐇]

Brian's vacant stares onstage are not to do with his illness. It's because Jeff has fed his autocue through Google Translate first into Arabic then back into English. Brian has not retreated in on himself, he is merely trying to make sense of this

Tour Tour Wrap
I wrap
Yes
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread

Bugged im gettin driving up and down the same old sector
I gotta finda new place where hip kids

My friends are getting real data known
Yes, the bad guys know us and they leave us alone

I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Tour
Wrap Tour Tour OOOO
Wah Wa OOO
Wah Wa OOO
Wah Wa OOO

We always take the reason my car has never been won
And weve missed yet never with the girls we meet

Any of the men go steady cause it would not be right
To leave their best girl home now on Saturday night

I wrap
Wrap round round I wrap
From one city to another
Wrap round round I wrap
Im a real head cold
Wrap round round I wrap
Im McCain a real good bread
Wrap round round I wrap
I wrap
Tour
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

[acedecade75]

1.Owning a screeching falsetto that sounds like Frankie Valli having his balls being backed over by a steamroller.
2. Being a fat turd who shouts at fans for taking photos of Brian during gigs.

.....Oh wait, you said fictional crimes.

 True

[The Shift]

Anyone heard any news? Must be soon…