The Smiley Smile Message Board

Careful what you post or you may experience option 4.  He's a bad mutha.

Bruce is a good lookin guy, but I dont think Id like to sit in a bath with our nads rubbing against each other.

I think taking a bath with Bruce would be great...when he was my age maybe.  Not at the present time.  But in the early 60s, sure.

I think I'd least like to be around Bruce when he's informed of a death in the family.  I picture it being really sad.

Bruce Johnston: Emo before Emo was Emo.

If so, that's a sad and harsh road ahead for today's emo boys ...

He seems like a great guy to be around. I'd pick each option.

A bath with Bruce sounds like heaven.

I'd hate to be in a pillow fight with Bruce.


The idea of me going to prison for manslaughter is just too much...

aeijtzsche, you are a cold-blooded comedy-killer.

I would do all the above, except for maybe the pistol whipping, not into that stuff :(
Carly

"hang a big shift" is the only acceptable choice I saw, mainly because I don't know what it means.

I don't know if I'd rather be pistol-whipped or bathe with Bruce.. taking a bath with an old man is pretty weird, or any man for that matter.. but being pistol-whipped probably really hurts.

A pillow fight wouldn't be that bad, and if you go on 170 dates a year with someone, you'll end up getting used to him eventually. I also have no idea what hanging a big shift is.. but I guess I wouldn't mind as long as it's not dangerous.

I thought "hanging a big shift" would be car-related so I did some asking......if it is the same "hanging a shift" , it is the point where you excel and let off on the gas at shift point when you need to change gears (kinda like redlining).   So yes, I would definitely hang a big shift with Bruce. 
Carly

carlydenise, your information has been forwarded to Bruce and his people will be contacting you.  Bruce hopes you'll change your mind about the pistol-whipping and promises there'll be no tears in the morning.

Pistol whipping will be ok, as long as it's not a real pistol  ;D.  Then he can tell me how he writes the songs that make the whole world sing  :).....if I get breakfast, then definitely no tears in the morning!
Carly

I hear if you're real nice he'll even do your toenails!  ;D

Giving me the idea for a feature film: "170 Dates With Bruce Johnston"- co-starring Mike Love and carlydenise.  No one will be seated during the pillow fight scene.


  ::)

 :D :D :D :D, but does mike have to co-star????  We need to ask Mel if Brian is available

Well, the 170 dates referred to Mike's and Bruce's annual slate of appearances, so I hope you like fair food!

This is the best thread I have ever read on here so I decided to revive it. Of course I got this message:

Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

I had a hard time voting (you can only select one option) but I think pistol whipping in the bathtub could be kind of cool!

Just don't Photoshop a picture of Hitler pistol-whipping someone on Bruce's head. The board might self-destruct.

I have found my lifes work - to make this film  ;D

Voted bath, btw. Fella is not my type, tbqh

My vote was for bath, but I also think I'd dislike it immensely if he tried to fill my hand with kisses and a Tootsie Roll.

I really don't see how ANYONE could turn down kisses and a Tootsie Roll from Bruce!  Lots of chocolate!!

Yeah but think about how long he's been trying to give those things away....

"well oh my oh gosh oh gee, it really sends chills inside of me"   

YUM!!

It's official! Most of us would rather be hit in the head with a gun than share a bath with Bruce. Still rather him than Mike. Ginger pubes man, they creep me out.

Ginger Pubes?  Sounds like you've been where no man has gone before...

So tears in the morning is not an option? Hmmmm.

Mr. oldsurferdude hasn't been there? :)

I thought Ginger Pubes was a Laurel Canyon groupie. But I could be wrong.

unlisted, as it should be implied that this follows the bath.

How bout going shorts shopping with Bruce in say, 1981?

I'd go on the dates.

Date 1) We talk and get to know each other. We find we have quite a few things on common, and, most importantly, he makes me laugh.

Date 2) Dinner at Heston Blumenthal's. Fantastic food, fantastic company, fantastic shorts.

Date 3) Our first kiss!!!!!

Date 4) We park a bit, Bruce can hardly contain himself, (you've seen the shorts). I find it hard to stop but I want it to be special.

Date 5) Tonight's the night!!!!! Back to Bruce's. It is so perfect, candles, wine, a warm bath. Bruce goes to freshen up. Now's my chance. I'm opening the wardrobe. What's with all these shorts?. Here's the box, I'm breaking the lock. I have the acetates...REPEAT, I HAVE THE ACETATES, SEND IN THE CHOPPERS, GET ME OUT-TA HERE

:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

That's the post of the month!

But the month is so young and everything still!

But just then, Dennis kicks in the door and grabs you with both arms behind your back. Bruce comes out of the shower wearing just the tiny white micro-shorts, shaking his head as he and Dennis decide on just what to do with you  >:D

BATH!!!!!

Just then the radio transmission cuts out. Iron Horse desperately tries to get a signal but to no avail. He turns round to see Bruce standing in the doorway wearing a smile and nothing else. A gimp outfit, nipple clamps and copious amounts of Vaseline follow. Iron Horse Apples is never heard from on the smileyboard again. Occasionally Bruce dedicates "Slow Summer Dancing" to him. THE END.

Not quite the end!

Mike gets him after that!

This thread has made my night! :lol

This thread is going to give me nightmares.

Really funny nightmares, though.  :-D

Mike has no qualms about having sloppy seconds.

Wouldn't it actually be quite difficult to have your nads rubbing against each others? As I'm picturing it now, you'd have to link your legs together so that at least one of you had you foot up around the other's head or shoulder, and actively press said nads together. Personally I think Bruce is too old for that sort of thing and has a chair to lift him in and out of the bath, and probably a nice Mexican lady to scrub his back.

Holy brianista, that's just about put me off my lunch  :o

The last page of this thread is such epic win. I don't usually laugh at stuff I read on the internet.

The solution would be to simply both, facing each other, squeeze into a single pair of Bruce's shorts!

moustache ride

I'd rather not be in a bath with Bruce.
Now that would be disgusting  >:D

lame-o ::)

Don't see standing in line to vote or inexplicably shrinking daily (http://smileysmile.net/board/index.php?topic=13941.25;wap2) listed so I'll pass.