The Smiley Smile Message Board

Read a Mike Love onstage joke in a review recently ('In my day, 50cent would buy you 2 gallons of gas'  :lol) and I got to thinking about some of his jokes and comments over the years. I think the RnR Hall of fame speech and alleged negative comments about Brian, and Carls illness are terrible. I say alleged because I have yet to read of anyone hearing them in person, only second hand.

Some of the jokes get a good response though. Any other good examples, bad? Does he write them himself?

I was at a show prior to the 92 election where he pointed out some friends for some lobby group who the crowd didn't seem to impressed with. Don't know who. Must be some other clunkers over nearly 50 years of gigs?

edit...must use spelchek!

What did he say about Brian and Carl?

I've never been to a Beach Boys show, so I haven't personally heard any of his comments or jokes. I remember Mike saying that he thought it was funny when his jokes bombed and got no laughter, though.

For Brian it was along the lines of 'my genius cousin, he wrote the songs, stays home, we pay him to play the songs, what a genius' and Carl referring onstage to Carls illness in a tactless way.

Mike gave a real "winner" during the boot of the Seattle concert from '83. A shirtless Dennis rises from the drums to acknowledge the audience and Mike goes "ladies, don't forget to stuff Dennis' shorts with dollar bills". Some of you might have found it funny.

Hmm...I don't even know if that qualifies as "alleged," at least with Carl.  When did he crack a joke about Carl's illness ever?  I think one of the great myths of all time is that he wanted Carl out "because he was sick," and not the fact that he was just in no shape to keep playing with them.  More like "made up"?

"Alleged" doesn't require any truth, just that someone allege it. So it's alleged. Maybe wholly untrue--I have no idea--but pretty clearly alleged.

When I saw the Beach Boys Mike said "and here's a song for all the ladies here tonight, which proves to you we're not the village people!"

I'm sure Dennis stormed off in a huff.....in a minute and a huff.

  TM Time:

  http://fairfieldacc.com/cgi-bin/sitesearch.pl?mydatabase=db02&mytemplate=tp58&ID=119&method=perfect

 

I have an 82 concert where Mike was surprised by the number of trees growing in NY  and said he thought the only thing they grew in NY was
Puerto Ricans.
Al quickly said he talks about the Irish too, don't worry.

Perhaps they should perform the entire MIU album?

One subject I think Mike has never avoided onstage is the age of the group members, and the band. I can't recall anything similar from Mick Jagger!

At a concert I was at, some guy from the audience shouted "I love you!" and Mike said, "I love you too, just not in a Catholic sense."

What comes to mind is the unplugged concert from NY promoting the box.  Mike says "have you seen the new Clinton tax plan?  Now we gotta tour ALL YEAR"........really out of place comment in an otherwise joyful and well played celebration of BB music.   And he also seemed embarrassed about including Vegatables in he performance....."folks, not many bands have done songs about vegatables"

But, hey! thats Mike!

In my opinion, the most annoying thing Mike's ever said was during the Knebworth show - "Put your hands together, as they say". Is the "as they say" part really necessary? Ugh.

'Having Fun with Mike Love on Stage', a bootleg that should be compiled as soon as possible.

There's that one you can hear on the Big Sur festival where he lists every country that Cotton Fields was a hit in, and then going 'but not here', in a really prissy manner. You can almost hear the rest of the group blushing, not to mention the audience.

One thing i found really funny is from some other boot from the early 70's, as they tune up for Okie From Muskogee, you can hear Al go 'I hate this song' on mic, and then Mike goes 'You're going to love this song'....  ;D

He doesn't half go on, though, doesn't he? That's what annoys me about his stage patter. Like where he talks through the intro of a song, as the band are just waiting to start singing the damn thing, and he keeps on going....

Ooh, bitterness is never attractive is it!

I believe it was something along the lines of "Don't worry folks, he's not contagious"

I think a recent one is: "At this point, we're closer to hip-replacement than hip-hop."

When I saw them in Calgary, 89 or 90, Mike wasn't there and Brian was filling in for him.  Carl said that "our cousin Mike is sick and couldn't make it" and Brian chimed in with "in fact he might die!"  Carl and Al looked unimpressed with him.  It was funny/awkward.

I am certainly no Mike Love apologist, but I did see the Boys on their 1997 tour (actually, one of Carl's last shows in August), and have a couple of live CD's of that tour.  I never heard or saw Mike display anything but the utmost respect for Carl and his condition that tour.  Actually, it was the most "un-Mike-like" behavior I recall him displaying.

I didn't actually hear it so I don't know for sure, someone asked what Mike supposedly said and that was something I had heard

I like Mike's jokes. Even when they're not funny. It wouldn't be the same band without them, in my opinion.

From Eric's Setlist Archive:

State Fair, Allentown, PA
September 3, 1983

This was the first of two shows on this particular day; both shows were at the same venue. Reportedly, "Graduation Day" was an impromptu performance for three girls in the audience who had just graduated and were travelling.

C-Man notes: "Prior to the Car Medley they performed about 30-seconds of 'Okie From Muskogee' (after Mike teased the audience about doing a country medley instead)...Bruce dedicated 'Disney Girls' to birthday boy Alan Jardine, saying 'I think it's really great a guy can be in a band 21 years and grow up not being a drug addict in rock 'n' roll or an alcoholic', to which Mike replied 'We can't all be Wilsons!'"

RIMSHOT Oh that Mike...  :lol

From a recent concert:

"This song was written by my cousin Dennis."
(audience cheers wildly)
"Save it, he's not here!"

Somebody should really make a comp of hilarious Mike stage banter.
For example this one of Paul Stanley

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxivUlXK8Q0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxivUlXK8Q0)

ROCK N' ROLL PNEUMONIA!!!!!!!

Can't forget "We shortened the name of this song from California Girls Are Pregnant...", "We've got excellent financing available for the Box Set.", "Those striped shirts we used to wear were getting pretty smelly...", "Justin Timberwolf and those boys from N-stink...", "We were on a tour bus with the Buffalo Springfield and got all drunk and stoned and stuff...", "How 'bout a car song? Take ya back to your adolescence!", singing "don't like 'em" in the middle of Vegetables...

Now thats good!

I agree.

I like how Mike, given the oppurtunity to call any popstar he likes a lazy good-for-nothing, chooses to insult The Beatles, and two of the greatest live acts of all time  ::)

To be balanced, I wonder why he didn't include Brian (standing with him) in that rant?

I don't think those comments are nearly as offensive as they're generally made out to be.

The Beach Boys have been around for a very a long time, and continue to put on a great show night after night; I think that's all he's trying to say. Maybe he could've had better word choice, but that is the feeling I get from those comments. (Again, my opinion).

Sorry, just to digress I wanted to include one of my favorite Dennis quotes, introducing "Surfer Girl" in 1977, Largo:

"This one is for all of the ladies here tonight. Even Michael."

That. Was. Amazing.

 :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

 MEL On The Move:

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJNFGuKdIDk

I thought he was trying to call all those rock stars out for a fight!!!

The Wit and Wisdom of Mike Love........This could fill a book.

But you know, aside from Dennis, no one else in the band ever really talked much to the audience.  SOMEONE has to be the "front" man.  Or woman.  I think of Grace Slick insulting audiences worldwide and embarrasing herself and the band many times albiet in an altered and/or  drunken state.

And lets not forget the motor mouths of Lennon and Crosby over their careers.

Just sayin.....  :angry

In the early 70s, Bruce used to talk to the audience a lot, too.

True.  I remember now that you mention it.  When I saw them last year he said little or nothing.  He got up and led clapping briefly and then sat back down at the keyboard

Cool. What exactly did he say around 4:10 about some PBS-special ?

Oh he sure did. When the audience wouldn't stop yelling for oldies during Sunflower songs, Bruce got mad. He said, " I'm getting really pissed off at you people who won't shut up and let us play some new songs for you." I was shocked a bit, but not as much as my first Beach Boy concert in 1968 when Mike said between songs, " Boy, our sound guy really sucks tonight."

That's a really good way to ruin your performance!

Bruce's comments during the Grateful Dead/BB show are cringe-worthy. Very cringe-worthy.

I know, I like Bruce, I think he's talented but my god, that guy has never been cool.

Has anyone said the Mike at Knebworth quote, just before cotten fields he says something like 'you can blame Al Jardine for this song'  ;D

Yes he's Bruce Johnston, a Beach Boy, and I experienced both flavors of his personality. Example: tracked hin down to a restaurant in Austin after a concert in 1969 and he signed the Friends album for me with a smile. Numerous times backstage over the years, he just glanced in my direction with no words. What took the cake though was when he stuck his head in my car before heading into his hotel to chastise my wife and me for keeping the kids out so late. And he was really serious. I had advance knowledge of their plane coming in on a Friday night and I knew the hotel. We followed the vans and I got my ass chewed out. Carl, by the way, waved and shouted hello with a big grin. Mr. Mom, Bruce Johnston.

I'm watching that concert right now, so I'll listen for that one. He just said the, "Put your hands together, as they say," that Aegir mentioned :lol

I can think of two. At the CBS Convention in 1977, Mike says something like "And now we're gonna bring out THE MAN! I'm talking 'bout my CUZ!". For some reason, I always thought it sounded pretty cool , the way he yelled out THE MAN!  ;D Another really cringe-worthy one is during the intro to SDT(I think?) from Carnage Hall, 1972. He was talking about the audience clapping, and said something like "I mean, if  you're not into it, you're not into it. If you can't get behind it, you can't get behind it", in a really goofy voice. ::)

All I ever seem to have heard Bruce saying on stage are the albums on which the particular song is.
Plus "We're going to Kokomo!"


Mike's goofines surely had some charm in the beginning, but as they became older and almost hip, it just was terrible imo. There's at least one review in the Badman-book that mentions this as disturbing, too. Nah, I really don't like most of his stage banter. There are some cool ones, though "Uncomfortable seat" anyone?  ;D

Best Mike comment ever was from Syracuse in May 1971.

Mike - You wanna know what a Polish mind detector is?
Bruce - Oh, this joke SUCKS.
Mike - THIS is a Polish MIND DETECTOR.
(Awkward silence)
(Circus organ)

  Bruce at his best:

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBl1M4lDHik&feature=related

 
 
 

Best at what? Taking up space?

That last one sticks out for me as an example of his insufferable smugness, just a gratingly ingratiating self-absorption and overweening ego. His role in the band and in writing lyrics for many of the songs is undeniable, but there is a possessiveness and sense of entitlement that is disproportionate, and a truly nauseating cutesiness, smarminess and palpable pleasure in hearing the sound of his own voice. He has mellowed out a lot in recent years though.

But seriously, ask me what I REALLY think. >:D

I would think even Mike and Bruce would like to rant like this on some nights.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrAakyDV0Ag

Agreed, on all points. I am glad that he has toned that  a lot in recent years.

Hehe. Yes. The uncomfortable seat. Nobel Prize Material. Mike has an uncanny sense of breaking a song's tension/beauty with some stupid vocal interspersion. Like: 'different tempo (y'all singalong)' in Good Vibrations, Live In London. Or the horrific namecheck of Al Jardine at the end of Lady Lynda (Knebworth), that I mentioned earlier.

If you listen to Good Vibe's on Knebworth and during the audience sing-a-long he mentions the camera's. I think Carl say's 'Good One'.

That's actually one of my favorite Mike coments, I always smile at that.

Or the 93 Box Set Tour in New York when it comes to "Disney Girls":

Mike: "You can hear it in every elevator in the country."
Bruce: "Right after Kokomo"

1988 during the intro of "Be true to your school", when the sound guy messes up the echo:
"Was this the echo from last year's show??"

AWO Sessions, Switzerland, Beach Boys Show 2003: the audience, mostly upper-class well-suited golf-playing people (it was a charity show), whom Mike refers to as "the handicap section".

During the show he asks the seated audience to get up an dance:
"come on, those are rock'n'roll based songs. Stand up. Help thy neighbour!!"

 :-D

Sounds like these ones were straight out of the Rodney Dangerfield joke book!

More lke Don Rickles don't you think?

Mike Love went into a bar, sat down,  and ordered a drink.  The bartender said Hey we don't get many Beach Boys in here.  Mike said, no, and at these prices I'll have to sue Brian Wilson again we'll have to tour ALL YEAR!

Hey, I'm Aussie, I'm not that familiar with the work of Don Rickles. We might be California V2.0 but we're not totally absorbed in American culture, we have our own Strayyan kulcha to worry about too. Anyhoos I was think more Dangerfield circa Caddy Shack.

Rickles is a well known old time insult comedian.  Dangerfield was more self deprecating. Rickles is known for hurling insults at the audience.

Is Strayyan Kulcha an insult comedian?  An odd name.   Sounds Eastern European. :p

I don't wanna be austen tayshus about it so here's some strayyan kulcha for ya.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97YnGQE1q6M&feature=related

(It helps if you lived through the era and get the esoteric connections)

Considering all the odd things Mike Love says on the '69 Live In London album I've always wondered what "exotic influence" he was under during the concert. Or maybe British food drove him to fasting! (for you Brits reading this, I've been to England and loved the cuisine so don't take it personally!)

Chad Stuart once told me "Bruce Johnston should have been a diplomat instead of wasting his time doing music". My late father (who ranked "Hawaii 5-0" as one of his favorite TV shows) used to say Bruce looked like Jack Lord!

Our family went to LA several times during the '60s & '70s. Several months after one of our visits (in either '75 or '77) The Beach Boys were on TV and my mom pointed to Mike Love and said "I saw him Farmer's Market"!

Rickles is funny. Check him out at Dean Martin's roasts :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ALHiadIsKo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ALHiadIsKo)

So Groucho Marx was on stage with them?