The Smiley Smile Message Board

Will someone who is older than I am please tell me that growing older, losing sense of childhood dreams, growing detatched from parents and friends, having to grow up, gain responsibility, and all of that junk isn't as bad as I see it to be now?

I'm wearing a watch right now, it tells me that it's 20:36 PM right now. In 4 hrs i'll be getting into bed, ready to sleep for 6 hrs. After those six are through, i'll wake and leave for school. When I get home I'll spend the hours 14:45 PM to 12:00 AM doing the same as today, yesterday, and every day before that. Everything is a complete illusion; The thoughts i'm expressing now may seem cheap, fake, childish, and naive to me in the close future. Those thoughts then will still be illusions to that future self.

Old Folk, gimme some thoughts.

How bout tomorrow when you get home. Leave your PC off and play some guitar, maybe a little piano. Then when you're bored, hop on your bike and goto the mall. Meet people, interact, instead of sitting around moping and wasting your life away.

FFS.

Oh yeah.  Go for a walk.  Listen to the music of the world around you.  Smile at a stranger; look at all the strangers to see if they smile at you.  Expect something good.  Look for something beautiful. 

Quit wallowing in it.

What's FFS?

I play my guitar and keyboard all day. Same room as computer. I swivel one direction and I land here, swivel the other direction and i'm at the helm of my recording set up, complete with guitar and keyboad. I also drink Diet Arizona Green Tea, taking little ten minute breaks between anything that i'm doing to drink it. Meeting people at the mall is like smashing my head open with a sledge hammer --- i'd lose just as many brain cells and IQ points. I used to be a very social person, did all the typical stuff; now I can see the transparancy in all of that stuff.

Thank you, I understand your suggested points well. I think i'm passing off the wrong impression about myself around here; I'm not as mopey and miserable as I make myself out to be. I could be doing the most cheerful and delightful activity, purely enjoying the moment, but yet there's a small voice inside telling the truth about whatever it is. Telling of how wasteful it is, or time consuming, or pointless, etc. The reason I seem so flushed with dread here is because this is my only outlet to be honest. I don't express these thoughts on the, "outside". Out there, it's all a fun time with people.

Come on sport, we'll get through these times together.

That´s the whole point. Right there. The importance of something isn´t important at all as long as you enjoy it! It just doesn´t matter if it´s useful or a waste of time as long as you like doing it.

To answer your original question,  I find that growing older has many advantages in terms of being more comfortable with yourself and more self assured.  You gain the perspective of years.  You see that the worry you had as a younger person was largely unnecessary and was due to apprehension and uncertainty about the future.  The turmoil of adolescence is something everyone goes through and a rocky but normal step in the development of the adult person.  Except for the opportunity to live longer, I would not want to go back to my teens.  Its true that youth is wasted on the young.

So why not start enjoying yourself now?   

Rerun makes a good point: The point of a thing is the thing itself, not how much time it takes or what else you might be doing.  Say, for instance, you go to a movie with friends.  The movie is pure escapism - a fantasy, or a car-chasin'-waaah-hooooo, or whatever.  You laugh and enjoy the movie and the company of your friends...and THAT IS the point.  You haven't wasted that time.  All of your time doesn't need to be spent in Worthwhile Pursuits, or whatever - we are allowed to have fun.  In fact, having fun is a pretty important part of what we're supposed to do.  It rejuvenates us; it relights the spark.  We are forced to spend time doing things we DON'T want to do - work, school, whatever; we need to make sure that we have time for ourselves as well.

And Donald's right.  This IS something that most adolescents pass through relatively unharmed and unscathed.  You'll get through it, too.

Here's another thought: Perhaps you SHOULD be sharing your fears and unhappinesses with the people around you ikn your real life.  I suspect that your classmates are having the same feelings, and your parents went through it, too...you might find that it makes you feel better to know that you're not the only one.

Well put. It's another way of expressing the fact that life is ultimately about the need to experience intrinsic pleasure. The more truly intrinsic pleasure we experience, the more fulfilling life is.

I don't think you meant to credit me with any words of wisdom...

You're right, Rerun - sorry.  My mistake.  I meant JRauch.

Just don't ever mistake me for being wise again and we'll be fine.

That in itself is very wise.

*ulp*  Never again.  I promise.

I'm 25, that old enough? You're whining too much. That's my diagnosis. Get a damn grip.