The very worst Beach Boys related 'song' ever released

[Micha]

'Hey Little Tomboy'
'California Calling'
'Summer of Love'

 

Well, I think 'Summer of Love' is only the second worst they ever did, and the other two you mention I can totally stand. Not that I ever feel like listening to them...

[Grayhands]

Thanks for opening my eyes to all of these songs, I actually really like Hey Little Tomboy besides the terrible lyrics which make me laugh especially when Carl sings "Time to turn into a girl" after the first verse.
And for choice of worst song, no doubt 'summer of love' takes the top spot. It feels like a comedy song/sketch that should have appeared on SNL.

[Mendota Heights]

Oh, and I like Battle Hymn also... Perhaps I more interesting thread would be 'Clearly sh*t Beach Boys that you honestly genuinely un-ironically really like'!

I like Battle Hymn of The Republic too. Don't understand the hate for this recording.

[Mr. Wilson]

dellydel.. I get your drift .. As a true fanatic of BB I should find something in everything they do to be pleasing to the ear.. And I generally do find something good to say about them.. Out of the 40 songs I listed only about 10  are ones I would totally  skip completely .. The other 30 are just below the standards of BB music IMHO only.. And im surprised they got released or even recorded.. Example " My Solution" to me is a goof + throwaway..  But I sure am glad BW used the music for "Happy Days"..  Stevie is an excellent song + should  be released.. But those Cocaine sessions are humiliating to hear..  And Country Love and those 80"s Mike + Dean stuff is  .. I mean ive been to a BB show a number of times when they had a hiccup or a weak show( Long Beach 81) and still had a good time..  It's only R+R and I like it.. Im forgiving to the guys cause there is more positive over the years than negative..

[bluesno1fann]

7 letters: TPLOBAS.

That's the worst, no further discussion.

No way is it worse than Summer Of Love 

I'm certain even Dellydel wouldn't be able to find anything redeeming about that fecal festival!

[bluesno1fann]

It's definitely gotta be "Smart Girls", hands down. That song is the embodiment of every rock fan's stereotype of what they think rap music is but actually isn't. Quite rightly, it's a complete and total embarrassment.

... except that it remains resolutely unreleased.

Can we all agree that "Smart Girls" is THE song that would never see official release by the powers-that-be, even if hell froze over?  I think we'd see "Teardrops On My Bed" get official release before "Smart Girls".

I've always considered Smart Girls a guilty pleasure song. Sure, it's not very good, but it's a pretty funny and entertaining attempt at rap by Brian.
Give me Smart Girls over Beach Boys Medley or the whole of SIP anyday!

[CenturyDeprived]

And for choice of worst song, no doubt 'summer of love' takes the top spot. It feels like a comedy song/sketch that should have appeared on SNL.

I agree with that - and the fact is that the song actually was originally written for/intended as being part of a TV comedy universe (just not the SNL universe, but The Simpsons universe)...I wonder what the inception of "Summer of Love" as a Bart Simpson duet may have had to do with influencing how that song turned out.

Does anyone here know any history behind that?

[Rotat]

I know people have very different definitions of what it means to be a "fan" of something, but I want to share mine:

When I'm a fan of someone (a musician, an actor) I pretty much think they sh*t gold.  Since I'm a fan of the Beach Boys, I must think that everything they sh*t out has some gold in it.  And I do.  

Back in the day they used to sh*t 90% gold, and maybe 10% sh*t.  Over the years the gold/sh*t ratio has changed, sure, but there's always gold to be found there, even if it takes some digging.

So to me there's no such thing as a Beach Boys song that sucks all the way, because if they're the Beach Boys, and they are, and if there's at least 3 or four of them involved, as there usually is, then there's must be some gold in that poop!

For example, the song It's A Beautiful Day.  It ain't great.  But Carl's "living out in LA... such a beautiful daaaaay" part is great.  So there's a kinda crappy song that has 20 seconds of greatness, but I must've listened to it 25 times.

I don't own Summer in Paradise, as it's been out of print forever, and it's kinda terrible, but I've still listened to it on Youtube dozens of times.  Why have I listened to something that's kinda terrible dozens of times?  Because it's The Beach Boys and they go ooooh and aaaaaah and how bad could that be?  And if I owned Summer in Paradise on CD I'm sure I would've listened to it 100 times... and that's THEIR WORST ALBUM!  

(which is why my mind is blown... BLOWN... when I hear some board members describe songs or entire albums as UNLISTENABLE!!!)

Anyhoo.  That's my fandom.  And sorry for all the scatological imagery.    

And for the record, i LOVE When Girls Get Together, Hey Little Tomboy, Bill & Sue, and I think Smart Girls is some kind of crazy demented awesome.

Awesome post! I feel about the same.. My theory is the voices. Or that's my own reason why I will like some of their shittier stuff. When at least a good chunk of the BBs are doing their harmonies and if there's a nice Carl vocal on it, it really makes it for me, like on Still Cruisin'. The production might be sh*t, and the song subpar (Island Girl for example), but it can be so catchy and it's great to recognize the guys voices on a song.

Regarding H.E.L.P: I love that song.. I think Brian didn't hold back on the lyrics on that song and wrote exactly how he felt at the time. Plus it gets stuck in my head all the time. That one has actually kind of been a classic for me. I actually kind of wanted to put together a comp of songs that were just 100% Brian creations during this 1969/1970 period, or co-writes that were very much his style that he could have recorded on his own, like Sail Plane Song also.

It's crazy the different tastes and various types of songs people are picking  in this thread (Day In The Life Of A Tree?? Really?? )

[Gabo]

And I Always Will is another bad one.

I don't understand the whole Postcard From California thang. Why did he make an album almost completely of Beach Boys rerecordings?

[bluesno1fann]

And I Always Will is another bad one.

I don't understand the whole Postcard From California thang. Why did he make an album almost completely of Beach Boys rerecordings?

You mean less than half the album?

Remakes or not, it's still one of the better solo BB's albums

[Gabo]

You mean less than half the album?

1. A Postcard From California
2. California Feelin' - Beach Boys remake
3. Looking Down The Coast - Beach Boys remake
4. Don't Fight The Sea - Beach Boys remake
5. Tidepool Interlude
6. Campfire Scene - Beach Boys remake
7. A California Saga - continuation of the same Beach Boys remake
8. Help Me Rhonda - Beach Boys remake
9. San Simeon
10. Drivin'
11. Honking Down The Highway - Beach Boys remake
12. California Dreamin' - Mamas and Papas/Beach Boys remake
13. And I Always Will
14. Waves Of Love - Kinda, sort of a Beach Boys remake
15. Sloop John B - Beach Boys remake

[bluesno1fann]

You mean less than half the album?

1. A Postcard From California
2. California Feelin' - Beach Boys remake
3. Looking Down The Coast - Beach Boys remake
4. Don't Fight The Sea - Beach Boys remake
5. Tidepool Interlude
6. Campfire Scene - Beach Boys remake
7. A California Saga - continuation of the same Beach Boys remake
8. Help Me Rhonda - Beach Boys remake
9. San Simeon
10. Drivin'
11. Honking Down The Highway - Beach Boys remake
12. California Dreamin' - Mamas and Papas/Beach Boys remake
13. And I Always Will
14. Waves Of Love - Kinda, sort of a Beach Boys remake
15. Sloop John B - Beach Boys remake

I discount 14 and 15 as they aren't part of the original album. As for Don't Fight The Sea, Looking Down The Coast and Campfire Scene, they weren't released BB's songs, so I discount them as remakes

[adamghost]

I know people have very different definitions of what it means to be a "fan" of something, but I want to share mine:

When I'm a fan of someone (a musician, an actor) I pretty much think they sh*t gold.  Since I'm a fan of the Beach Boys, I must think that everything they sh*t out has some gold in it.  And I do.  

Back in the day they used to sh*t 90% gold, and maybe 10% sh*t.  Over the years the gold/sh*t ratio has changed, sure, but there's always gold to be found there, even if it takes some digging.

So to me there's no such thing as a Beach Boys song that sucks all the way, because if they're the Beach Boys, and they are, and if there's at least 3 or four of them involved, as there usually is, then there's must be some gold in that poop!

For example, the song It's A Beautiful Day.  It ain't great.  But Carl's "living out in LA... such a beautiful daaaaay" part is great.  So there's a kinda crappy song that has 20 seconds of greatness, but I must've listened to it 25 times.

I don't own Summer in Paradise, as it's been out of print forever, and it's kinda terrible, but I've still listened to it on Youtube dozens of times.  Why have I listened to something that's kinda terrible dozens of times?  Because it's The Beach Boys and they go ooooh and aaaaaah and how bad could that be?  And if I owned Summer in Paradise on CD I'm sure I would've listened to it 100 times... and that's THEIR WORST ALBUM!  

(which is why my mind is blown... BLOWN... when I hear some board members describe songs or entire albums as UNLISTENABLE!!!)

Anyhoo.  That's my fandom.  And sorry for all the scatological imagery.    

And for the record, i LOVE When Girls Get Together, Hey Little Tomboy, Bill & Sue, and I think Smart Girls is some kind of crazy demented awesome.

I think Dellydell should be made a 5-star honoured guest for that post alone.

Seconded.

[Gabo]

Absolute nadirs, discounting mediocrities:

Lots on the debut, but especially Ten Little Indians and Chug-A-Lug.
Pre-66 album filler like Bull Sessions and Denny's Drums. "I'm Bugged At My Old Man" is also quite awful.
Transcendental Meditation
Make It Good
So much of 15 Big Ones. Even the old outtake "Susie Cincinatti" is terrible. I HATE that song. OOOO NATTY SUSIE CINCINATTI are the backing vox from hell.
I think "A Casual Look" may get the Golden Turkey, though, for its derptacular vocals from Mike. Derp derp.

Also, seriously Adult Child mostly sucks. The lyrics are on a completely different level of terrible from those on Love You (which I somehow like).

An example, the opening line of possible the album's best song, Still I Dream Of It:

"Time for supper now, day's been hard and I'm so tired I feel like eating now." Dreadful.

There are too many bad songs from 1978-2012 to choose from, but the Here Comes The Night remake, Lady Liberty, and the Surfin' remake may be the foulest.

For Brian solo, Desert Drive is particularly gnarly. Them lyrics is tuuurrible.

[phirnis]

Some of the songs mentioned are personal favorites of mine, like TM (the Friends song) or Bill and Sue.

I really dislike Beaches in Mind, the Peggy Sue / School Day remakes, Louie Louie, Santa's Got an Airplane... That last one is pretty painful I think.

[Gabo]

Some of the songs mentioned are personal favorites of mine, like TM (the Friends song) or Bill and Sue.

I really dislike Beaches in Mind, the Peggy Sue / School Day remakes, Louie Louie, Santa's Got an Airplane... That last one is pretty painful I think.

Seriously, Al is so into remaking stuff. He turned Brian's beautiful Sail Plane Song into the atrocious Loop De Loop, changed Loop De Loop into the even more atrocious Santa's Got An Airplane, changed Lady Linda into the absolutely godawful Lady Liberty, are there more examples (discounting his solo album)?

My conclusion is that Al has never had an original musical idea in his life. Not that I don't like him as a person and vocalist (I do).

Also, Beaches In Mind is TERRIBLE. Nothing production-wise could have saved that song.

[Micha]

7 letters: TPLOBAS.

That's the worst, no further discussion.

No way is it worse than Summer Of Love 

Yes.

It.

Is.

Sorry, Summer Of Love only clocks in second. Close second though.

[Disney Boy (1985)]

7 letters: TPLOBAS.

That's the worst, no further discussion.

No way is it worse than Summer Of Love 

I'm certain even Dellydel wouldn't be able to find anything redeeming about that fecal festival!

I can't be bothered mentally running through every BB song - what's TPLOBAS?

[gfac22]

The Private Life of Bill And Sue

[Please delete my account]

An example, the opening line of possible the album's best song, Still I Dream Of It:

"Time for supper now, day's been hard and I'm so tired I feel like eating now." Dreadful.

I love that line! Though it loses something written down without the music to go along. I feel that way all the time. Hunger is not divorced from sadness and weariness- they so often come together in a bundle, especially if you have a comfort-food addiction. It also sets the scene for the song. The second line is great too. The only part of that lyric I don't like is the middle eight.

[Nicko1234]

And I Always Will is another bad one.

I don't understand the whole Postcard From California thang. Why did he make an album almost completely of Beach Boys rerecordings?

And I Always Will doesn't deserve to be mentioned in this thread. It should have been completed and included on BB85.

Summer of Love and Speed Turtle are the worst.

[dellydel]

7 letters: TPLOBAS.

That's the worst, no further discussion.

No way is it worse than Summer Of Love 

I'm certain even Dellydel wouldn't be able to find anything redeeming about that fecal festival!

Hehe.  Ok yeah it's pretty terrible... most of the lyrics suck, the production sucks, the era sucks, BUT... the chorus ain't half bad!   The "girls are always ready for the summer of love, goooing out looking...." I like, and I like how the second line is sung deeper than the first, creating a kind of circular, higher pitched, lower pitched... circle... of love?  Ok, there's no way I can explain this properly

And hell, I guess Mike Love doing his almost-rapping deep voice thing is kind of a guilty pleasure.  Did I mention I like ridiculous things?   

Ok, now lets talk about how awesome Brain's "Water Builds Up" is!  I swear I wake up singing that song two days a week.

 

[drbeachboy]

I know people have very different definitions of what it means to be a "fan" of something, but I want to share mine:

When I'm a fan of someone (a musician, an actor) I pretty much think they sh*t gold.  Since I'm a fan of the Beach Boys, I must think that everything they sh*t out has some gold in it.  And I do. 

Back in the day they used to sh*t 90% gold, and maybe 10% sh*t.  Over the years the gold/sh*t ratio has changed, sure, but there's always gold to be found there, even if it takes some digging.

So to me there's no such thing as a Beach Boys song that sucks all the way, because if they're the Beach Boys, and they are, and if there's at least 3 or four of them involved, as there usually is, then there's must be some gold in that poop!

For example, the song It's A Beautiful Day.  It ain't great.  But Carl's "living out in LA... such a beautiful daaaaay" part is great.  So there's a kinda crappy song that has 20 seconds of greatness, but I must've listened to it 25 times.

I don't own Summer in Paradise, as it's been out of print forever, and it's kinda terrible, but I've still listened to it on Youtube dozens of times.  Why have I listened to something that's kinda terrible dozens of times?  Because it's The Beach Boys and they go ooooh and aaaaaah and how bad could that be?  And if I owned Summer in Paradise on CD I'm sure I would've listened to it 100 times... and that's THEIR WORST ALBUM! 

(which is why my mind is blown... BLOWN... when I hear some board members describe songs or entire albums as UNLISTENABLE!!!)

Anyhoo.  That's my fandom.  And sorry for all the scatological imagery.     

And for the record, i LOVE When Girls Get Together, Hey Little Tomboy, Bill & Sue, and I think Smart Girls is some kind of crazy demented awesome.

I think Dellydell should be made a 5-star honoured guest for that post alone.

Seconded.

I'm with you guys on this. Even the worst songs have some redeeming grace, if only vocally, and even if only by one of the vocalists. For the record. my least favorite song is "When Girls Get Together", but there is some cool stuff going on musically that catches my attention and keeps me from hitting the "Next" button every time it comes on.

[phirnis]

Some of the songs mentioned are personal favorites of mine, like TM (the Friends song) or Bill and Sue.

I really dislike Beaches in Mind, the Peggy Sue / School Day remakes, Louie Louie, Santa's Got an Airplane... That last one is pretty painful I think.

Seriously, Al is so into remaking stuff. He turned Brian's beautiful Sail Plane Song into the atrocious Loop De Loop, changed Loop De Loop into the even more atrocious Santa's Got An Airplane, changed Lady Linda into the absolutely godawful Lady Liberty, are there more examples (discounting his solo album)?

My conclusion is that Al has never had an original musical idea in his life. Not that I don't like him as a person and vocalist (I do).

Also, Beaches In Mind is TERRIBLE. Nothing production-wise could have saved that song.

I basically agree about Al. Great singer but he doesn't seem to have an awful lot of creative energy when it comes to writing songs on his own. I still think he did some fantastic collaborative work with Brian - Wake the World, Good Time, even Santa Ana Winds.

I feel Beaches in Mind is the kind of song that doesn't appeal to (most of) the diehards and neither is it a very good "commercial" song (unlike, say, Kokomo). Just completely pointless and it makes the group sound really old in an unpleasant way. In that regard it's probably the complete opposite of Pacifc Coast Highway.

[Micha]

The Private Life of Bill And Sue

If I had an OSD personality, I'd answer this post with a cascade of "woot"s. I won't though.